Today while out to lunch with a friend and her son, I ordered fresh pineapple juice. One of the perks of living here is the incredibly delicious and huge variety of fruit and fruit juices! The waitress paused... then she said, "Maybe you shouldn't have pineapple juice... it's really not good for you right now." I'm very obviously pregnant and even though this is my second time around, I'd never heard about this. Neither did my friend who has two young children. The waitress didn't know why it wasn't good for me. So I had to google it of course (don't you love that google is a verb now?). It's an old wive's tale that pineapple brings on contractions... and there is some evidence that large amounts of it can. I love pineapple. I ate a big plate of it last weekend for breakfast. Anyway, to avoid the 'look' of judgement and just in case she was right, I ordered green apple juice. She felt this was a good choice. Then I ordered coffee. Her response was, "We have decaf..." My response, "Umm, no I indulge in one thing and that's coffee - I'll have regular." *smile and giggle* Thankfully, this was a restaurant frequented by expats so getting normal coffee with fresh milk on the side was not a problem (although the milk is always heated and I like mine cold). By the way, the waitress was actually really sweet and was just acting out of concern for me.
Last week while in a taxi, the driver asked if I was going to be in confinement after the baby is born. I said no. He looked at me like I was absolutely nuts... crazy... it must be my 8-month pregnant hormones talking! Terry added that this is my second child. Ohhhh..... well, that's not so bad then... but he still seemed concerned. It's customary around here for new Chinese moms and their babies to go in confinement for one month (it's 44 days for Malays and 30-40 days for Indians). The belief is that your body is out of balance that first month and you need that time to re-energize and recover from giving birth. Many people hire a confinement nanny, a pui yuet, who assists with all you and baby need.
Sounds good, lah? Wellll..... there are rules to follow during Chinese confinement. You must stay inside. You must not wash your hair. You must avoid cold elements such as cold water or air conditioning (it is believed this is a 'cold' stage due to loss of blood and energy). You must bath only with water specially prepared with specific herbs. If you follow these rules for retaining heat in your body, it is said you will avoid other health issues later in life.
Although the idea of confinement is attractive health-wise, I will likely go for daily walks with baby in my carrier, wash my hair (if I have the time and energy), and bask in the air conditioning. Today I was going to update my Facebook status to say, "I am a furnace." I am looking forward to cooling off - although that may not happen until I move back to Canada.
Other things have been heating up these days besides me. After my employment ended, my Employment Pass was terminated and I had a 30-day Social Visit Pass. I traveled to Hong Kong via plane, and when I re-entered Singapore, I had another 30-day Social Visit Pass... which expires this coming weekend. I applied for a Long Term Visit Pass and was declined. Apparently, the route I took for my Long Term Visit Pass last Fall can only be taken once. Now I need a local sponsor - which I do not have. I appealed my application and included a letter from my doctor saying I need to stay here for medical reasons until the end of July. My appeal was denied.
Earlier this week Terry and I went to see someone at the Immigration Checkpoints Authority of Singapore. The lady was... ummmm... rude. Maybe she was having a bad day. Maybe she didn't believe in our situation of not being married. Maybe she was dealing with some serious personal issues. Whatever the reasons for her poor service and lack of compassion, I have to admit I started to stress a little. At the end of our conversation (which started to heat up since Terry was floored at the lack of help she was giving us), she mentioned something about the hospital helping us. So we made our way to Thompson Medical Centre. Indeed, they have a service to help with applying for Permission to Deliver in Singapore. Who knew we'd need permission when I've been living here for almost a year?! It all stems from not being married... we've considered just doing the deed to streamline this process, but, well, you know me;) Anyway, the lady who is now helping us is soooo super sweet and compassionate and helpful. She said for me not to stress.... Singapore is not so cruel to kick me out when I'm just about to deliver.
Upon her recommendation, I've applied for a 30-day extension to my Short Term Visit Pass. That brings me to a couple of days after my delivery date - if in fact it is approved... I'm still waiting to hear. We also need a Marriage Certificate for this application. Since we do not have one, we need a letter from our Canadian Consulate stating the status of our relationship. Turns out they won't provide one, but we can submit an affidavit stating our relationship. And this needs to be notarized. And the Notary Publics must be really busy these days because they aren't very available and it might take some time to get this accomplished... oh, and they don't necessarily accept all affidavits. Today we'll submit our affidavit and see how it goes.
So right now, I'd be happy to pass on the pineapple, pass on the coffee, and get a Pass that allows me to stay in Singapore until we leave at the end of July. Otherwise, I'm not sure where they'll send me since no airline will let me fly with them at this point in the pregnancy. I'm trying to meditate and tell myself this is all going to work out fine... don't waste my energy on worrying about something that will probably not happen (thank-you Wayne Dyer for your book Your Erroneous Zones which I read several years ago).
Hmmmm.... if my 30-day extension is granted, maybe I should run down to the market and pick up a few pineapples.... I'll be able to fly 30 days after birth. Shockin', wha?!
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