When I told people I was moving to Singapore, the general comments were that it's clean, it's conservative, and there isn't much to do. These comments were from people that did not live here. Others that either knew people living here or connected me with those living here had other things to say, like, you'll love it there, there's so much to do, and it's a hub for travel.
Most expats I've met or heard about are either single, married without kids, or married with young children. And this is the place to be if you are child-less or have young children! The night life is terrific, the entertainment scene is colorful and always happening, and the whole country is dedicated to children - malls have children's play areas, there are family washrooms everywhere, condos have several areas for children, kids shopping is probably as good as it gets in the world, there are learning centres for children everywhere, and kids activities are plentiful. Parents are also very dedicated to their childrens' growth and development. There is a swimming centre for infants here. You can peer in through a window to see the tiny babies about 2 or 3 months old floating and kicking in 2 feet of water in a big sink-like pool. It unnerved me to see it to be honest, but maybe one of those babies will be an Olympian swimmer some day.
We haven't quite figured out what teens do here other than hang out in coffee shops, smoke sheesha, go to school, hang out at restaurants, hang out in malls, hang out.... I'm sure there are other things, we just haven't found them yet. Teens are given a lot of social freedom because it's incredibly safe here.
True to everyone's word, Singapore is also very clean for a big city. There is garbage around, though, which amazes my daughter and me because everyone raved about Singapore's cleanliness. It's hard to find a garbage can, but you can usually find one next to an escalator in a mall. And I have yet to see a recycling bin in public. Bathrooms in touristy places can be pristine to fairly clean. Bathrooms in more local places can be fairly clean to downright dirty. You won't find toilet tissue in most bathrooms. There's lots of squatting here too... and as you sit in some stalls with a toilet (you can go to the squat stall if you like of course), you read the sign that says, 'Do not put feet on toilet seats.' Terry jokes that he's going to be so local soon that I'll find foot marks on our toilet seat at home. A pub we visited last weekend had a bathroom for men, which was disgustingly smelly and dirty, and a bathroom for women, which was through a private door into a hotel and was clean and 'fit for tourists'.... and no footprints on the seats!
Like other areas of the world, Singapore's birth rate is declining. So the government has organized dating events. Only singles are allowed to attend them, and the purpose of them is for men and women to meet, fall in love, get married, and have children. Yep, I'm serious. And it's working! I read an article yesterday in the paper about one couple's success. Their advice for successful dating was to be open minded, be friends first, and dress well. I was also advised to dress well for interviews and you can attend workshops on how to dress well. It's important here.
There are plenty of reasons for the decline in birth rates.... one of which is the desire for the 5 C's. Singaporean men tell us that women won't marry you unless you have Career, Cash, Credit Card, Car, and Condo. A 2-3 bedroom condo is around S$800,000 and a cars are around 3x more expensive here than in Canada. It's not easy on those men! Of course, there are some very highly paid positions here and I read in the paper that the percentage of high net worth individuals rose by 32.7% last year. I was also advised that most positions in Singapore are generally paid lower than an equivalent position in Canada or the U.S. so expect to be paid less.
It is true - Singapore is relatively clean and structured - yes, somewhat like the utopia in Brave New World (a must read). However, it is far from boring. There are extremes to almost every situation, and the duality of Singapore makes it interesting to study.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Two Steps Forward
We have been in Singapore for 6 weeks, short a day. And reality is definitely setting in. Progress around here is finding a place you've been looking for, beginning to understand Singlish, and noticing smiles amongst a rushing crowd (and do not stop amongst a rushing crowd!)
If you've seen my status on Facebook, you know that I finally found a supermarket that sells familiar food! It's expensive though. S$11 (approx. $8.50 Cdn) for a tiny container of red pepper dip, S$8 for the same amount of hummus, and S$11 for a box of Triscuits! A large box of Corn Flakes, however, is only S$3.55!! Local food is much more affordable, and we are adjusting our tastes. Lime juice is one of my preferences now... of course, there are two types of lime juice: Singapore lime juice, which to me is more like lemon juice and my daughter's new favorite drink; and Indian lime juice, which to me is much better. I'm even starting to crave Tom Yum soup, Gado Gado, and Mee Siam.
Terry and I have signed up for a yoga class and I've found a ton of activities to take in over the year. I found a Mandarin class, but it doesn't meet our schedule, so I'm still looking for that. I found the post office. I found pots. I found a running shirt. I found a salad that tastes good!!! I found a book store that sells brown paper and bubble wrap to wrap parcels. I managed to get an x-ray and a blood test for my pass even though I was sent to four different clinics. Clinics are everywhere, though, so all four were one MRT stop from each other.
Progress, lah (that's a Singlish word).
Understanding Singlish is not as easy as being lost and trying to find your way around town centres. One evening last week, my daughter and I went to our favorite hawker stand, and the guy who is always working there says, 'sheelee'.... ummmm... pardon? 'sheelee'.... *smile* pardon? '*smile... chuckle.... guy next to him chuckles... shows us the sheelee....' Ohhh... chilli!! Yes!! We love this guy and we all had a grand laugh.
Today I was sitting in a clinic staring off into space and I hear a name being called. I'm listening intently but I do not hear my last name. It's called again. Nope, not me. I look over only to see the lady staring at me and saying "Miss Tina?" Right.... they call you Miss or Mr. *first name* here. But... then I get a smile when she realizes I understand now. Ahhhhh...
Smiles. Yesterday I was pushed and shoved and squeezed by people. Rudeness exists here too. But today I got smiles from everyone at the clinics (how could I get frustrated when they kept sending me elsewhere?), and the lady at McDonald's who serves me coffee a few times a week now smiles when she sees me coming. I wonder if she is laughing at me for my order (coffee black and a small fresh milk). It doesn't matter. I'm getting a smile. The instructor of my workshop last week was full of positive energy and smiles. Typically, people that work in the service industry are friendly, and it really does make the difficulties of the day fade away.
I'm still searching for a job, and everything I hear and read tells me it's tough to secure one without being a permanent resident or citizen. Maybe not so different from home?? It won't stop me of course. Maybe I'll get an interview and my smile will work?
The saying is two steps forward, one step back... and that's exactly how I feel. But the steps back are where the real growth is. Step back to take a breath. Step back to be present. Step back to realize the lesson. With every challenge there is success, and does it ever feel better if it was difficult than if it was easy. I questioned our relocation this week when my daughter was experiencing homesickness. But a good night's rest gave us both a better perspective. This is the best thing we could have done for ourselves. Our steps back are providing us the challenges we need to be pushed two steps forward.
Must get me some mee siam.
If you've seen my status on Facebook, you know that I finally found a supermarket that sells familiar food! It's expensive though. S$11 (approx. $8.50 Cdn) for a tiny container of red pepper dip, S$8 for the same amount of hummus, and S$11 for a box of Triscuits! A large box of Corn Flakes, however, is only S$3.55!! Local food is much more affordable, and we are adjusting our tastes. Lime juice is one of my preferences now... of course, there are two types of lime juice: Singapore lime juice, which to me is more like lemon juice and my daughter's new favorite drink; and Indian lime juice, which to me is much better. I'm even starting to crave Tom Yum soup, Gado Gado, and Mee Siam.
Terry and I have signed up for a yoga class and I've found a ton of activities to take in over the year. I found a Mandarin class, but it doesn't meet our schedule, so I'm still looking for that. I found the post office. I found pots. I found a running shirt. I found a salad that tastes good!!! I found a book store that sells brown paper and bubble wrap to wrap parcels. I managed to get an x-ray and a blood test for my pass even though I was sent to four different clinics. Clinics are everywhere, though, so all four were one MRT stop from each other.
Progress, lah (that's a Singlish word).
Understanding Singlish is not as easy as being lost and trying to find your way around town centres. One evening last week, my daughter and I went to our favorite hawker stand, and the guy who is always working there says, 'sheelee'.... ummmm... pardon? 'sheelee'.... *smile* pardon? '*smile... chuckle.... guy next to him chuckles... shows us the sheelee....' Ohhh... chilli!! Yes!! We love this guy and we all had a grand laugh.
Today I was sitting in a clinic staring off into space and I hear a name being called. I'm listening intently but I do not hear my last name. It's called again. Nope, not me. I look over only to see the lady staring at me and saying "Miss Tina?" Right.... they call you Miss or Mr. *first name* here. But... then I get a smile when she realizes I understand now. Ahhhhh...
Smiles. Yesterday I was pushed and shoved and squeezed by people. Rudeness exists here too. But today I got smiles from everyone at the clinics (how could I get frustrated when they kept sending me elsewhere?), and the lady at McDonald's who serves me coffee a few times a week now smiles when she sees me coming. I wonder if she is laughing at me for my order (coffee black and a small fresh milk). It doesn't matter. I'm getting a smile. The instructor of my workshop last week was full of positive energy and smiles. Typically, people that work in the service industry are friendly, and it really does make the difficulties of the day fade away.
I'm still searching for a job, and everything I hear and read tells me it's tough to secure one without being a permanent resident or citizen. Maybe not so different from home?? It won't stop me of course. Maybe I'll get an interview and my smile will work?
The saying is two steps forward, one step back... and that's exactly how I feel. But the steps back are where the real growth is. Step back to take a breath. Step back to be present. Step back to realize the lesson. With every challenge there is success, and does it ever feel better if it was difficult than if it was easy. I questioned our relocation this week when my daughter was experiencing homesickness. But a good night's rest gave us both a better perspective. This is the best thing we could have done for ourselves. Our steps back are providing us the challenges we need to be pushed two steps forward.
Must get me some mee siam.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Lucky Face
I have discovered that seeing a place twice makes me remember it. The first time I'm too caught up in the logistics. One day this week I trotted off to the Esplanade for the second time, where I hoped I'd see more Moonfest activities. Moonfest was apparently over, but I did meet an Indian Yogi.
Moonfest is a Chinese Autumn Festival where they make and eat mooncakes and celebrate the moon. I haven't tried a mooncake yet but they are supposed to have a full egg in the middle of them and are quite expensive to purchase... around S$35 for 4 mini cakes the size of muffins. Last weekend, although a movie and take-out sounded delightful after my shocking week, my daughter and I met Terry at the Esplanade for some Thai food. It was the lantern festival with lots of chinese lanterns, music, and shows - fantastique! We mosied to the upstairs theatre after a divinity moment (the best chocolate ice cream ever) and caught a show of traditional female chinese dancers and traditional male...umm... martial arts/dancers. These guys were in wicked shape and could jump higher than their own height. They slapped and pounded the floors, landed aerials, and performed in unison to make an impact. It was awesome and my spirits were lifted!
Thinking I'd get a repeat, I hopped on the MRT this week and made my way to the Raffles Place stop.... 40 minutes and one transfer later I was in the financial district at lunchtime! Woah! To say it was mesmerizing is an understatement. It was mobbed, I had no idea what direction to walk in, I was hungry, and it was hot. Finally, after about 30 minutes of circling, I found a Starbucks.... coffee and muffin please.... and a seat in the shade with my currently favorite magazine, Human Resources (which I can only find at Starbucks), and a map! Ahhhh.... I came out the wrong exit of the MRT. I managed to find my way to the Esplanade after that only to find that there were no more Moonfest activities. But it was a beautiful day as I wandered around taking in the gorgeous views, sipping on a mango juice. There were lots of tourists around (they also had maps) - I guess partly because Formula One is here this weekend. I almost bought a cup of corn... they sell loose corn here for a snack. It looks just like our corn. :)
On my return to the MRT, I guess I looked calm and happy, thinking about how much I love my flip flops because I can walk and walk and my feet don't hurt. Who knew flip flops could be more comfortable than sneakers? Anyway, an Indian guy stopped me and said, "Excuse me ma'am, your face looks very lucky." I beg your pardon? "Your face is lucky. You are healthy and happy, can I see your forhead?" Umm... sure! "You have three lines." - great, thanks! - "One is happiness and yours says you are very happy. One is health, and you are going to live a long life, die in your sleep peacefully between the ages of 87 and 95." Woohooo! "The middle line is wealth. You think too much about your wealth." Oh dear. After all those books I've read, you'd think I wouldn't do that. Then again, I am unemployed.
I wasn't quite sure what to think, but I went along with it all. He asked to sit down so we did - I was in no hurry. He asked questions, did a little magic trick, tried to tell me my fortune, and I was enjoying the time. Then he told me he was a yogi from India who travels from country to country to talk about meditation and yoga. Oh, too cool! I have manifested this spectacular meeting! I'm brilliant!! He asked if I was poor, medium, or rich. Well, obviously I'm not poor nor rich, so of course I'm medium. He had written P - 50, M - 100, R - 150 on his paper. He told me since I am medium, I should pay him S$100 and he will tell me three ways I can improve my wealth. Bahhahahahahah! I asked him if he was offering this as a service? He said no, he is a yogi from India who travels from country to country and does not get paid for what he does. I said, well, is this a service you are offering for me to pay for? Nope. So I said, I'll pay you S$4 because I enjoyed my time but that's it. He was not very happy, but I was, and I walked away. He told me I will have an unhappy heart because I would not give him more money.
I give buskers money. I give beggars money sometimes. I donate money and time. I pay for services. But I was not told he worked on a fee for service basis or that he was asking for charity. I do feel lucky (and my heart is shining with happiness). And maybe my face showed it. Or maybe this guy thought, there's a white tourist and she must have money. Maybe not. The point is, it happens.
Discrimination happens frequently here. The country does not tolerate racial slurs or disrespect of other cultures or religions. But you might not get hired if you are an expat wife who doesn't need the money... or if you are planning on having children... or if you don't look the part... or you're too old. There are no employment discrimination laws here. There is an organization that promotes hiring a person for their skills, but it's not enforced in any way.
I may have a lucky face, but I'm not counting on luck to find a job. I joined the American Association of Singapore and have started attending workshops (also an excellent reason to explore another part of the city).
Moonfest is a Chinese Autumn Festival where they make and eat mooncakes and celebrate the moon. I haven't tried a mooncake yet but they are supposed to have a full egg in the middle of them and are quite expensive to purchase... around S$35 for 4 mini cakes the size of muffins. Last weekend, although a movie and take-out sounded delightful after my shocking week, my daughter and I met Terry at the Esplanade for some Thai food. It was the lantern festival with lots of chinese lanterns, music, and shows - fantastique! We mosied to the upstairs theatre after a divinity moment (the best chocolate ice cream ever) and caught a show of traditional female chinese dancers and traditional male...umm... martial arts/dancers. These guys were in wicked shape and could jump higher than their own height. They slapped and pounded the floors, landed aerials, and performed in unison to make an impact. It was awesome and my spirits were lifted!
Thinking I'd get a repeat, I hopped on the MRT this week and made my way to the Raffles Place stop.... 40 minutes and one transfer later I was in the financial district at lunchtime! Woah! To say it was mesmerizing is an understatement. It was mobbed, I had no idea what direction to walk in, I was hungry, and it was hot. Finally, after about 30 minutes of circling, I found a Starbucks.... coffee and muffin please.... and a seat in the shade with my currently favorite magazine, Human Resources (which I can only find at Starbucks), and a map! Ahhhh.... I came out the wrong exit of the MRT. I managed to find my way to the Esplanade after that only to find that there were no more Moonfest activities. But it was a beautiful day as I wandered around taking in the gorgeous views, sipping on a mango juice. There were lots of tourists around (they also had maps) - I guess partly because Formula One is here this weekend. I almost bought a cup of corn... they sell loose corn here for a snack. It looks just like our corn. :)
On my return to the MRT, I guess I looked calm and happy, thinking about how much I love my flip flops because I can walk and walk and my feet don't hurt. Who knew flip flops could be more comfortable than sneakers? Anyway, an Indian guy stopped me and said, "Excuse me ma'am, your face looks very lucky." I beg your pardon? "Your face is lucky. You are healthy and happy, can I see your forhead?" Umm... sure! "You have three lines." - great, thanks! - "One is happiness and yours says you are very happy. One is health, and you are going to live a long life, die in your sleep peacefully between the ages of 87 and 95." Woohooo! "The middle line is wealth. You think too much about your wealth." Oh dear. After all those books I've read, you'd think I wouldn't do that. Then again, I am unemployed.
I wasn't quite sure what to think, but I went along with it all. He asked to sit down so we did - I was in no hurry. He asked questions, did a little magic trick, tried to tell me my fortune, and I was enjoying the time. Then he told me he was a yogi from India who travels from country to country to talk about meditation and yoga. Oh, too cool! I have manifested this spectacular meeting! I'm brilliant!! He asked if I was poor, medium, or rich. Well, obviously I'm not poor nor rich, so of course I'm medium. He had written P - 50, M - 100, R - 150 on his paper. He told me since I am medium, I should pay him S$100 and he will tell me three ways I can improve my wealth. Bahhahahahahah! I asked him if he was offering this as a service? He said no, he is a yogi from India who travels from country to country and does not get paid for what he does. I said, well, is this a service you are offering for me to pay for? Nope. So I said, I'll pay you S$4 because I enjoyed my time but that's it. He was not very happy, but I was, and I walked away. He told me I will have an unhappy heart because I would not give him more money.
I give buskers money. I give beggars money sometimes. I donate money and time. I pay for services. But I was not told he worked on a fee for service basis or that he was asking for charity. I do feel lucky (and my heart is shining with happiness). And maybe my face showed it. Or maybe this guy thought, there's a white tourist and she must have money. Maybe not. The point is, it happens.
Discrimination happens frequently here. The country does not tolerate racial slurs or disrespect of other cultures or religions. But you might not get hired if you are an expat wife who doesn't need the money... or if you are planning on having children... or if you don't look the part... or you're too old. There are no employment discrimination laws here. There is an organization that promotes hiring a person for their skills, but it's not enforced in any way.
I may have a lucky face, but I'm not counting on luck to find a job. I joined the American Association of Singapore and have started attending workshops (also an excellent reason to explore another part of the city).
Monday, September 20, 2010
It's Electrifying!
It's recommended that you bring a few familiar items with you when you move to a new place, especially a new country. We brought some photos, movies, and a few odds and ends, but not much. My daughter found the movie Grease while on one of our outings a while back and absolutely had to have it. Surely, it was because she had it at home and it was familiar because she hadn't watched it in quite a while!
So now we have the movie Grease to add to our few items that remind us of home. And I have discovered culture shock. I think you have some level of culture shock no matter where you move. I experienced it when I moved to a small community of 200 people in NL with a one month old. Then again, the culture difference between that place and my home town was about the same as between home and here.
Last week was one of those weeks when everything you do turns to crap or you're faced with yet another dead end. Now that Terry is settled into work, my daughter is settled into school, and the apartment is feeling more like home, it's time for me to figure out what my life is going to be here. Yahoo! I have space and time and I can do and be whatever I want!! Uh-oh.
I started applying for jobs. No feedback on those yet. I was turned down for about a hundred jobs in the Middle East, Australia, and New Zealand before I decided where to relocate, so I'm getting used to rejection. I have a few options... I could work in HR, learning and development, project management, team management, business improvement, export/trade, research, etc. Many job openings I've found that are suitable for me require an ability to speak Mandarin; however, some simply state that it would be an asset to have that ability... so I apply for those. Interestingly, you don't always get a response when you submit an application here. It's also widely accepted, and I think THE way to get a job, to call the HR Director to discuss the opening. They must be bombarded with calls, don't you think? I've been reading up on employment laws and practices here... and from what I've read, it seems HR is behind other areas of the world such as Canada. This could be an advantage for me if a company is more progressive in their HR practices... and those companies do exist. It's also common practice, apparently, to hire people you know around here. So it's off to more researching conferences and workshops I go.... only to find that the one conference that is affordable is the same time as my daughter's October break and we are thinking of taking a trip. Another one was exclusively for CEOs, VPs and Directors. Exclusive is a common word in Singapore.
After a few days of frustration with job and career activities, I decided to turn my focus to social and lifestyle activities. I have been searching for a dance studio for my daughter since before we left Canada. Her training is in a style called Cecchetti Ballet, which we can not find around here. She stumbled upon a website one day that said they offered Cecchetti Ballet classes, so I called.... nope, the website was entirely incorrect - not only do they not offer that style of dance, but they don't offer any ballet exams in any style. I started another hour or two long search on the internet for the right studio.... and I ended the search after finding nothing that seemed 'right'. On the bright side, my daugher takes a dance class in school and is going to ask her instructor for advice.... and the dan:s festival is here in Singapore next month and we are going to see some of the most amazing dancers in the world! Yay!
So onto Tina's life again.... I went in search of Mandarin classes. My introduction to Bahasa Indonesian has really inspired me to learn another language, and since Mandarin is the number one language of the world, and it would be beneficial in the world of business, that's what I've chosen. We have a book that is like our bible - it's called 'Singapore - The Complete Residents' Guide'. It lists about a half dozen websites for places that offer Mandarin courses. I checked them all and they either don't offer the classes or only offer them to exclusive groups. I emailed one place that looked promising, but they responded with a negative. I decided face-to-face might be the way to figure this one out... so I visited our neighborhood community club. When I asked the man at the front desk if they offered a Mandarin course, he chuckled and said, 'No, we offer English.' This living in the boonies is starting to get to me! My uncle came to my rescue after seeing my desperation on facebook (my status) and contacted a friend he knows here... I now have the name of someone to call. Maybe this week will see the fruits of my efforts.
I decided to take stock. Job - nope. Conference - nope. Dance studio - nope. Mandarin course - nope. Let's try yoga.... There are yoga classes many places. After we found a dance studio that we thought offered the right classes, I realized there was a yoga studio next door.... and it offered yoga for the eyes! I kid you not! I really must try this... I wonder does it improve your eyesight? I'm totally excited about it. Anyway... that is not the kind of yoga I'm seeking right now. I'm looking for a daytime class in my neighborhood. Most of the studios I've found are about an hour away (and incredibly expensive)... and to me it's just not ideal to have to travel an hour to my yoga class, and then have to return in that messy crowd after rejuvenation. However, on my little laughable trip to the Community Club, I did strike on a schedule of yoga classes, a few of which are offered one morning a week. SUCCESS! Of course, you have to have a pass in order to register... so I just have to have a little more patience.... I will have my long-term-visit pass really, really soon.
I also checked out tai chi.... it's offered more widely than yoga it seems... but that class is taught in Mandarin, and I figured I had enough frustrations right now to have to try to follow a Mandarin instructor. To add to all this, I have yet to find where to buy a postage stamp and send a package in the mail (I think I've checked 10 places to date)!
Amongst all the dead ends I started to feel like I was floundering, I was wasting precious time, I was desperately fighting irritability, and I had a cold (yes, one of those things with a stuffy nose, sore throat, floaty head, and exhaustion... I never get sick?!). Being me, I had to figure out what was going on with me... so I went to one of my favorite ex-pat websites and it popped out clear as mud... I was experiencing culture shock (the cosmic energy is also all out of whack so that explains some of it too).
The first stage of culture shock is called the Honeymoon stage and it lasted for 3-4 weeks for me - it varies for everyone. It's a period when everything is wonderful and new and exciting.... just like it was with your partner. (Of course, I'm still in the honeymoon stage with my partner! haha!) Next is the Negotiation phase where you start to notice the differences between your old culture and this new one. Sometimes people glorify their homeland, and usually you get a bit negative, irritable, and tired during this time. Eventually, you reach the Adjustment phase, where you'll either accept or reject the culture.
I have been oscillating between all three phases... not too severly, but they are certainly coming up. THANK-YOU to whomever named culture shock! I am not insane!! I am clearly a very normal, well adjusted, stable woman who, if didn't go through this completely normal phenomenon, would not be normal, and then where would I be?!?!
Once I realized my normalcy, I did a bit of chakra balancing - gotta love Deepak... and Grease.
So now we have the movie Grease to add to our few items that remind us of home. And I have discovered culture shock. I think you have some level of culture shock no matter where you move. I experienced it when I moved to a small community of 200 people in NL with a one month old. Then again, the culture difference between that place and my home town was about the same as between home and here.
Last week was one of those weeks when everything you do turns to crap or you're faced with yet another dead end. Now that Terry is settled into work, my daughter is settled into school, and the apartment is feeling more like home, it's time for me to figure out what my life is going to be here. Yahoo! I have space and time and I can do and be whatever I want!! Uh-oh.
I started applying for jobs. No feedback on those yet. I was turned down for about a hundred jobs in the Middle East, Australia, and New Zealand before I decided where to relocate, so I'm getting used to rejection. I have a few options... I could work in HR, learning and development, project management, team management, business improvement, export/trade, research, etc. Many job openings I've found that are suitable for me require an ability to speak Mandarin; however, some simply state that it would be an asset to have that ability... so I apply for those. Interestingly, you don't always get a response when you submit an application here. It's also widely accepted, and I think THE way to get a job, to call the HR Director to discuss the opening. They must be bombarded with calls, don't you think? I've been reading up on employment laws and practices here... and from what I've read, it seems HR is behind other areas of the world such as Canada. This could be an advantage for me if a company is more progressive in their HR practices... and those companies do exist. It's also common practice, apparently, to hire people you know around here. So it's off to more researching conferences and workshops I go.... only to find that the one conference that is affordable is the same time as my daughter's October break and we are thinking of taking a trip. Another one was exclusively for CEOs, VPs and Directors. Exclusive is a common word in Singapore.
After a few days of frustration with job and career activities, I decided to turn my focus to social and lifestyle activities. I have been searching for a dance studio for my daughter since before we left Canada. Her training is in a style called Cecchetti Ballet, which we can not find around here. She stumbled upon a website one day that said they offered Cecchetti Ballet classes, so I called.... nope, the website was entirely incorrect - not only do they not offer that style of dance, but they don't offer any ballet exams in any style. I started another hour or two long search on the internet for the right studio.... and I ended the search after finding nothing that seemed 'right'. On the bright side, my daugher takes a dance class in school and is going to ask her instructor for advice.... and the dan:s festival is here in Singapore next month and we are going to see some of the most amazing dancers in the world! Yay!
So onto Tina's life again.... I went in search of Mandarin classes. My introduction to Bahasa Indonesian has really inspired me to learn another language, and since Mandarin is the number one language of the world, and it would be beneficial in the world of business, that's what I've chosen. We have a book that is like our bible - it's called 'Singapore - The Complete Residents' Guide'. It lists about a half dozen websites for places that offer Mandarin courses. I checked them all and they either don't offer the classes or only offer them to exclusive groups. I emailed one place that looked promising, but they responded with a negative. I decided face-to-face might be the way to figure this one out... so I visited our neighborhood community club. When I asked the man at the front desk if they offered a Mandarin course, he chuckled and said, 'No, we offer English.' This living in the boonies is starting to get to me! My uncle came to my rescue after seeing my desperation on facebook (my status) and contacted a friend he knows here... I now have the name of someone to call. Maybe this week will see the fruits of my efforts.
I decided to take stock. Job - nope. Conference - nope. Dance studio - nope. Mandarin course - nope. Let's try yoga.... There are yoga classes many places. After we found a dance studio that we thought offered the right classes, I realized there was a yoga studio next door.... and it offered yoga for the eyes! I kid you not! I really must try this... I wonder does it improve your eyesight? I'm totally excited about it. Anyway... that is not the kind of yoga I'm seeking right now. I'm looking for a daytime class in my neighborhood. Most of the studios I've found are about an hour away (and incredibly expensive)... and to me it's just not ideal to have to travel an hour to my yoga class, and then have to return in that messy crowd after rejuvenation. However, on my little laughable trip to the Community Club, I did strike on a schedule of yoga classes, a few of which are offered one morning a week. SUCCESS! Of course, you have to have a pass in order to register... so I just have to have a little more patience.... I will have my long-term-visit pass really, really soon.
I also checked out tai chi.... it's offered more widely than yoga it seems... but that class is taught in Mandarin, and I figured I had enough frustrations right now to have to try to follow a Mandarin instructor. To add to all this, I have yet to find where to buy a postage stamp and send a package in the mail (I think I've checked 10 places to date)!
Amongst all the dead ends I started to feel like I was floundering, I was wasting precious time, I was desperately fighting irritability, and I had a cold (yes, one of those things with a stuffy nose, sore throat, floaty head, and exhaustion... I never get sick?!). Being me, I had to figure out what was going on with me... so I went to one of my favorite ex-pat websites and it popped out clear as mud... I was experiencing culture shock (the cosmic energy is also all out of whack so that explains some of it too).
The first stage of culture shock is called the Honeymoon stage and it lasted for 3-4 weeks for me - it varies for everyone. It's a period when everything is wonderful and new and exciting.... just like it was with your partner. (Of course, I'm still in the honeymoon stage with my partner! haha!) Next is the Negotiation phase where you start to notice the differences between your old culture and this new one. Sometimes people glorify their homeland, and usually you get a bit negative, irritable, and tired during this time. Eventually, you reach the Adjustment phase, where you'll either accept or reject the culture.
I have been oscillating between all three phases... not too severly, but they are certainly coming up. THANK-YOU to whomever named culture shock! I am not insane!! I am clearly a very normal, well adjusted, stable woman who, if didn't go through this completely normal phenomenon, would not be normal, and then where would I be?!?!
Once I realized my normalcy, I did a bit of chakra balancing - gotta love Deepak... and Grease.
Pass!
These days the term 'pass' conjures up thoughts of our living status in Singapore. Without some sort of 'pass', you really can't do much of anything - rent videos, rent apartments, buy cell phones, join clubs, open a bank account, book tickets, etc.
Last week, my daughter received her student pass! Because I do not have an employment pass yet, and Terry is not her legal guardian (he has an employment pass), she cannot get a dependent's pass. The student pass allows her to live in Singapore until August 2012... and to get a student's package on her new iPhone, which includes unlimited texting - she's pretty pumped about the new phone:)
On Saturday past, I got the formal email stating I've been approved for a long-term-visit pass. I just have to pay and figure out what 'medical' means and provide all that before Oct. 2nd. So, although we'd already planned an adult night out, we had a celebration Saturday night. We visited Terry's friends and then went to Clarke Quay. Clarke Quay is like a high end George Street - no, Bourbon Street -because it's bigger and cleaner and has these enormous air conditioning structures hovering over the entire outside area. It offers a greater variety of entertainment than either. We went to a couple of bars, did the conga and salsa at a cuban bar, sited bellydancers while passing another restaurant (it was teeming with spectators - mostly men - so we couldn't really see much), and danced to 'western' music at yet another bar. It was a great night, albeit late (we met up with another of Terry's friends at around 2 a.m. and got home around 5 a.m.!). Singapore's bars are open until around 4 a.m... the area was still full of people when we left... although at the final joint we visited, they were only serving beer and only outside.
Needless to say, Sunday was very laid back. And today it's back to work and school... and while I'm trying to figure out life in Singapore in almost all aspects, my daughter is focused on life at school.
To date, I've seen some excellent education at my daughter's international school. She takes a course called Theory of Knowledge - basically a philosophical discussion course - and her teacher has decided to bring the theme of 'love' into this year's classes. Seriously. Love. Isn't that the best? She will also do an excursion trip to either Cambodia or India this year and do some community work while abroad. The school boasts about 80 extracurricular activities, and she's joined choir, dance/musical theatre, and art for a cause (in which she'll be creating a photography 'show' and fundraising for a selected cause). While being faced with social challenges (she's met lots of school friends but hasn't hung out with them after school hours yet) and academic obstacles (although she already completed grade 11 math in grade 10 last year, there are gaps in what the two schools taught so there's some extra learning sometimes), the overall school experience is excellent.
This Friday, her school is holding a fundraiser to raise money for a school in Ladakh, India, where the flooding in Pakistan and India has had a significant impact. Students and staff in her school have family members who have been affected. It is this worldly awareness and mindfulness that I see as one of the most important learnings for my daughter. It seems only a select few get this type of experience at home, while all students not only have an opportunity to receive it here, but it is part of the programming. The system and school are not perfect, of course... her school is constructing a new building for next year so their current location is temporary, and there have been some frustrating logistical issues. But this school gets a pass from us.
The school also offers opportunities for parent involvement... although less in high school than other years - not unlike home. I thought I might volunteer for something since I'd like to be involved... and I really need to meet some adults! I have done a few things... gone to the orientation and curriculum night. I arrived at curriculum night early (I'm never early) and waited for Terry. They had started when Terry arrived and I leaned over and said, 'you haven't missed anything, they are still talking about middle school.' About 20 minutes later, they ended and that was it. Nothing on high school. I thought I got the date wrong! I asked a teacher, who told me the high school session was in a different room! We found the other room, which was empty, and then wandered the halls until we found the high school classrooms. Phew! All the teachers were there and we managed to speak to them all.... this is a typical Tina moment of course - to go to the wrong room - but I've never missed a parent night at the school and felt a wee bit stressed:)
Testing and evaluating has begun for my daughter, and her studying has to be taken into consideration when we are planning weekend activities or excursions. It's one of the balancing things an adventurous expat parent needs to learn how to manage. And I'm only in the beginning stages of learning it. Moving to a new country is like school - you pass and you fail. When you pass, you continue to improve. When you fail, you get up and try again and figure out the lesson.
Last week, my daughter received her student pass! Because I do not have an employment pass yet, and Terry is not her legal guardian (he has an employment pass), she cannot get a dependent's pass. The student pass allows her to live in Singapore until August 2012... and to get a student's package on her new iPhone, which includes unlimited texting - she's pretty pumped about the new phone:)
On Saturday past, I got the formal email stating I've been approved for a long-term-visit pass. I just have to pay and figure out what 'medical' means and provide all that before Oct. 2nd. So, although we'd already planned an adult night out, we had a celebration Saturday night. We visited Terry's friends and then went to Clarke Quay. Clarke Quay is like a high end George Street - no, Bourbon Street -because it's bigger and cleaner and has these enormous air conditioning structures hovering over the entire outside area. It offers a greater variety of entertainment than either. We went to a couple of bars, did the conga and salsa at a cuban bar, sited bellydancers while passing another restaurant (it was teeming with spectators - mostly men - so we couldn't really see much), and danced to 'western' music at yet another bar. It was a great night, albeit late (we met up with another of Terry's friends at around 2 a.m. and got home around 5 a.m.!). Singapore's bars are open until around 4 a.m... the area was still full of people when we left... although at the final joint we visited, they were only serving beer and only outside.
Needless to say, Sunday was very laid back. And today it's back to work and school... and while I'm trying to figure out life in Singapore in almost all aspects, my daughter is focused on life at school.
To date, I've seen some excellent education at my daughter's international school. She takes a course called Theory of Knowledge - basically a philosophical discussion course - and her teacher has decided to bring the theme of 'love' into this year's classes. Seriously. Love. Isn't that the best? She will also do an excursion trip to either Cambodia or India this year and do some community work while abroad. The school boasts about 80 extracurricular activities, and she's joined choir, dance/musical theatre, and art for a cause (in which she'll be creating a photography 'show' and fundraising for a selected cause). While being faced with social challenges (she's met lots of school friends but hasn't hung out with them after school hours yet) and academic obstacles (although she already completed grade 11 math in grade 10 last year, there are gaps in what the two schools taught so there's some extra learning sometimes), the overall school experience is excellent.
This Friday, her school is holding a fundraiser to raise money for a school in Ladakh, India, where the flooding in Pakistan and India has had a significant impact. Students and staff in her school have family members who have been affected. It is this worldly awareness and mindfulness that I see as one of the most important learnings for my daughter. It seems only a select few get this type of experience at home, while all students not only have an opportunity to receive it here, but it is part of the programming. The system and school are not perfect, of course... her school is constructing a new building for next year so their current location is temporary, and there have been some frustrating logistical issues. But this school gets a pass from us.
The school also offers opportunities for parent involvement... although less in high school than other years - not unlike home. I thought I might volunteer for something since I'd like to be involved... and I really need to meet some adults! I have done a few things... gone to the orientation and curriculum night. I arrived at curriculum night early (I'm never early) and waited for Terry. They had started when Terry arrived and I leaned over and said, 'you haven't missed anything, they are still talking about middle school.' About 20 minutes later, they ended and that was it. Nothing on high school. I thought I got the date wrong! I asked a teacher, who told me the high school session was in a different room! We found the other room, which was empty, and then wandered the halls until we found the high school classrooms. Phew! All the teachers were there and we managed to speak to them all.... this is a typical Tina moment of course - to go to the wrong room - but I've never missed a parent night at the school and felt a wee bit stressed:)
Testing and evaluating has begun for my daughter, and her studying has to be taken into consideration when we are planning weekend activities or excursions. It's one of the balancing things an adventurous expat parent needs to learn how to manage. And I'm only in the beginning stages of learning it. Moving to a new country is like school - you pass and you fail. When you pass, you continue to improve. When you fail, you get up and try again and figure out the lesson.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Crossing the Border
It was a great coincidence (or not) that we had a long weekend for Hari Raya (end of Ramadan) just before my and my daughter's 30 day social visit passes were due. (My daughter received her student pass the other day, though - yahoo!) We decided to go to an island called Bintan in Indonesia, and we did not stay in the luxury resort where most visitors typically stay.
We arrived at the ferry terminal in Bintan in the dark and, after getting an Indonesia stamp (yay!), we went in search for our taxi. Drivers were lined up for the Club Med, Cabana, and other resorts of that nature... but nobody from our little beach resort. We easily found the taxi stand and booked our return ride as well (turns out we could have gotten a better deal had we not done that). Then off we went for a ride in the dark.
One would think an hour taxi ride in the dark on an island would not bring the same advantages of a daytime ride. Not so! It was the last day of Ramadan and celebrations were all over the place! We first saw a procession of vehicles - trucks with groups sat in the back and many motorbikes with 1-3 people aboard - drive slowly with lights flashing... I thought it was a funeral. But then we heard shouts and singing and music and horns beeping... the taxi driver said it was a 'victory', and indeed it should be. We saw two or three of these parade-like celebrations. Many of the roads were also lined with poles about five feet high and a fire burning on top. It was a spectacle and we felt honored to have seen it.. and feel the celebratory mood to kick off our weekend.
When we arrived at our resort, we were the only visitors there. Mr. Beach Boy - self-named and the manager of the resort (who is from Singapore and spends two weeks at a time at this resort because he loves beach life) - took care of us. Mr. Beach Boy, who later became known as 'boy', was always trying to save us money. He was highly disappointed that we'd already booked our return taxi ride because he found us a deal, and he told us how we could save money on transportation the next time we visit. He also asked how much we paid for our meals at other resorts because he was concerned (we think genuinely) about us getting ripped off. He was the entrepreneurial type, renting everything from bikes to snorkling gear to a deck of cards.
The first sight of our room was a bit of a shock for us all - yes, even Terry (my partner for those that don't know... I've decided to give him a name:). We had the best beach house on the resort! Waves gently splashed under the small wooden structure built on stilts, and we had our own private veranda that looked out over the ocean. We also had two single beds for the three of us, a bathroom that provided a non-flush toilet and cold shower sprinkler and friendly cockroaches as co-inhabitants in the night. I actually didn't see the cockroaches until our final night there. I definitely practiced mind over matter that night. We did have a mosquito net over the beds, but it was useless since it had numerous holes in it!
Our eating area was also camp-like with gecko-looking creatures crawling all over the walls. Occasionally, one fell off. My daughter and I were prepared for a glorified camping trip and that's what we got. However, Terry was a bit disappointed with our accommodations and worried we wouldn't be able to handle it... he was mistaken:)
Straight out from our beach house into the ocean, about 20-30 lights shone in the night. On our night of arrival, I thought we had a view of a little island... Terry thought they were boats; however, they were structures that floated in the water with a net beneath it that lowered and caught fish. People owned them and made a living fishing from them.
Throughout the weekend we were immersed in Indonesian culture. We grew a bit of a friendship with the owners, who cooked our authentic Indonesian dishes, served us Indonesian coffee and snacks, taught us some of the Bahasa Indonesian language (my best word was 'terima kasi' - 'thank-you'), and told us local stories. It turns out business in Indonesia is not so different from Canada - some customers do not pay, some customers make a mess or cause a fuss, and groups need to lobby government for change sometimes. The tourist resorts have joined forces and are curently fighting against the high VISA charge to enter Bintan - it's $25 US or S$40 per person and a deterrent for short visits to the island.
One day we rented bikes and rode through the village. Kids and youth smiled at us and yelled, "Hello Mister!" Almost everyone waved as we passed - we waved back feeling like celebrities. Young people giggled - I'm not sure if they were laughing at us being so 'white' or at themselves for practicing their English... or maybe my bangs (still looking pretty awful). But it was truly a magnificent experience. Houses are small and colorful there. Doors are left open and we could see families gathered together sitting on the floor. It's hot and humid, and many families are poor, so many homes seem run down and dirty. Even the larger, well maintained homes are difficult to keep clean because of the humidity.
We also snorkled a few times, swam in the South China Ocean, witnessed a crazy storm, walked along the beach siting crab holes, ate at a few restaurants (I found my hot ginger again!), saw turtles, and lazed around reading. My daughter was doing her homework on the beach one day and got swarmed by a group of children. Three girls her age asked her lots of questions and each of the seven or eight kids got a photo taken with her. She was pleased as punch. Apparently, sometimes students are encouraged by their teacher to talk to an English person if they see one.
We had a fellow visitor one night - Bulek. He lived/worked in Singapore but was from India. He shared some stories about his culture while Terry asked lots of questions and my daughter and I mostly listened intently... and laughed because he shared some funny stories. Bulek is getting married soon. He told us about the importance of astrology in picking your mate and your wedding date. People skilled at astrology will analyze 30+ traits you have as a result of your time and place of birth. You must have a minimum number in common with your mate in order for the marriage to be accepted by family and religion. He did mention that there are some 'experts' who, for the low price of $500, will find the minimum number of common traits required:) Bulek was also told by an expert astrologer when he was a young boy to stay away from water. He came snorkling with us the next day.
The Indonesian people we met were a fair bit conservative (by our standards) about some things. Girls wore their t-shirts and shorts while swimming, while boys could wear trunks. I was giving Terry a hug at one point and three teen girls were staring at us like we'd just removed our clothes! We stopped hugging of course. It's interesting to see how people from other parts of the world view us Westerners. We were an anomaly where we stayed, and people seemed to be quite intrigued with us. A French couple arrived one day and left within a couple of hours requesting their money back. Westerners do not stay in this place very often. That all said, people were incredibly friendly and smiled a lot. There was a language barrier, but it didn't impact the friendly gestures. One family gave Terry cookies - as he says, it was instant karma because he returned to the beach house to get my sunglasses for me:)
Life is pretty laid back in Bintan, even though people work hard - typically six days a week. And although there were language barriers, it always seemed to be fun to find ways to communicate... by the way, it's mineral water and not bottled water. We tried our best to attempt the language, and they were persistant in helping us learn it... or at the least to understand each other.
On our final day, a large group of locals invaded the beach and took over our private veranda. Our hosts gave us free coconuts, and later coffee and watermelon, to compensate. We really didn't mind, but they insisted. My daughter and I could not drink the coconut milk... I did try it but it's the first thing I honestly can't take. Terry didn't like it either, but drank and ate some of it nevertheless.
The locals are very close with their families and it was warming to see families having so much fun swimming, cooking and hanging out together. Parents do not hover over young children. At three and four years old, they swim with the older kids, splashing around as if on land without risk of drowning. Very young children ride on motorbikes either in front of the driver or in between the driver and passenger (no helmets and usually shorts and tank tops or t-shirts with no protective gear whatsoever). Our host's youngest son was four - Adey. He is a handful... one of our first introductions to him was with a huge knife in his hand as he wandered from the kitchen. All three of us tried to ease it away until Mom helped. Adey climbed up on a motorbike by himself, threw a lighter to the ground making it explode, and hauled off his drawers when he felt like being free! He got scolded for that one. He provided some entertainment, that's for sure.
We drove back to the ferry terminal in daylight. The taxi driver thought we were Australian, but that's all he said in English. The jungle was thick and at times reminded me of the forest at home with palm trees added in. Some trees were bare from leaves falling... reminding me of my favorite season at home... Fall. Mangy dogs ran along the sides of the road. Colorful houses with people sitting around them clustered in small villages. The low tides boasted about a kilometer of wet, muddy sand. And driving was cracked! Cars pass motorbikes and nearly scrape the motorbike drivers' elbows. On a two lane, narrow road, there can be three or four lines of traffic with passing or impatience. It was common to be driving facing another vehicle driving towards us. Somehow we arrived at the ferry terminal in one piece and enjoyed a relaxing hour on the ocean again.
When we arrived back in Singapore, it did feel like we'd returned home from vacation. Singapore is mostly a metropolis - pretty opposite to Bintan. And when we arrived at our apartment, we had a little visitor in our kitchen - a gecko-like creature was hanging out on the wall to welcome us home.
We arrived at the ferry terminal in Bintan in the dark and, after getting an Indonesia stamp (yay!), we went in search for our taxi. Drivers were lined up for the Club Med, Cabana, and other resorts of that nature... but nobody from our little beach resort. We easily found the taxi stand and booked our return ride as well (turns out we could have gotten a better deal had we not done that). Then off we went for a ride in the dark.
One would think an hour taxi ride in the dark on an island would not bring the same advantages of a daytime ride. Not so! It was the last day of Ramadan and celebrations were all over the place! We first saw a procession of vehicles - trucks with groups sat in the back and many motorbikes with 1-3 people aboard - drive slowly with lights flashing... I thought it was a funeral. But then we heard shouts and singing and music and horns beeping... the taxi driver said it was a 'victory', and indeed it should be. We saw two or three of these parade-like celebrations. Many of the roads were also lined with poles about five feet high and a fire burning on top. It was a spectacle and we felt honored to have seen it.. and feel the celebratory mood to kick off our weekend.
When we arrived at our resort, we were the only visitors there. Mr. Beach Boy - self-named and the manager of the resort (who is from Singapore and spends two weeks at a time at this resort because he loves beach life) - took care of us. Mr. Beach Boy, who later became known as 'boy', was always trying to save us money. He was highly disappointed that we'd already booked our return taxi ride because he found us a deal, and he told us how we could save money on transportation the next time we visit. He also asked how much we paid for our meals at other resorts because he was concerned (we think genuinely) about us getting ripped off. He was the entrepreneurial type, renting everything from bikes to snorkling gear to a deck of cards.
The first sight of our room was a bit of a shock for us all - yes, even Terry (my partner for those that don't know... I've decided to give him a name:). We had the best beach house on the resort! Waves gently splashed under the small wooden structure built on stilts, and we had our own private veranda that looked out over the ocean. We also had two single beds for the three of us, a bathroom that provided a non-flush toilet and cold shower sprinkler and friendly cockroaches as co-inhabitants in the night. I actually didn't see the cockroaches until our final night there. I definitely practiced mind over matter that night. We did have a mosquito net over the beds, but it was useless since it had numerous holes in it!
Our eating area was also camp-like with gecko-looking creatures crawling all over the walls. Occasionally, one fell off. My daughter and I were prepared for a glorified camping trip and that's what we got. However, Terry was a bit disappointed with our accommodations and worried we wouldn't be able to handle it... he was mistaken:)
Straight out from our beach house into the ocean, about 20-30 lights shone in the night. On our night of arrival, I thought we had a view of a little island... Terry thought they were boats; however, they were structures that floated in the water with a net beneath it that lowered and caught fish. People owned them and made a living fishing from them.
Throughout the weekend we were immersed in Indonesian culture. We grew a bit of a friendship with the owners, who cooked our authentic Indonesian dishes, served us Indonesian coffee and snacks, taught us some of the Bahasa Indonesian language (my best word was 'terima kasi' - 'thank-you'), and told us local stories. It turns out business in Indonesia is not so different from Canada - some customers do not pay, some customers make a mess or cause a fuss, and groups need to lobby government for change sometimes. The tourist resorts have joined forces and are curently fighting against the high VISA charge to enter Bintan - it's $25 US or S$40 per person and a deterrent for short visits to the island.
One day we rented bikes and rode through the village. Kids and youth smiled at us and yelled, "Hello Mister!" Almost everyone waved as we passed - we waved back feeling like celebrities. Young people giggled - I'm not sure if they were laughing at us being so 'white' or at themselves for practicing their English... or maybe my bangs (still looking pretty awful). But it was truly a magnificent experience. Houses are small and colorful there. Doors are left open and we could see families gathered together sitting on the floor. It's hot and humid, and many families are poor, so many homes seem run down and dirty. Even the larger, well maintained homes are difficult to keep clean because of the humidity.
We also snorkled a few times, swam in the South China Ocean, witnessed a crazy storm, walked along the beach siting crab holes, ate at a few restaurants (I found my hot ginger again!), saw turtles, and lazed around reading. My daughter was doing her homework on the beach one day and got swarmed by a group of children. Three girls her age asked her lots of questions and each of the seven or eight kids got a photo taken with her. She was pleased as punch. Apparently, sometimes students are encouraged by their teacher to talk to an English person if they see one.
We had a fellow visitor one night - Bulek. He lived/worked in Singapore but was from India. He shared some stories about his culture while Terry asked lots of questions and my daughter and I mostly listened intently... and laughed because he shared some funny stories. Bulek is getting married soon. He told us about the importance of astrology in picking your mate and your wedding date. People skilled at astrology will analyze 30+ traits you have as a result of your time and place of birth. You must have a minimum number in common with your mate in order for the marriage to be accepted by family and religion. He did mention that there are some 'experts' who, for the low price of $500, will find the minimum number of common traits required:) Bulek was also told by an expert astrologer when he was a young boy to stay away from water. He came snorkling with us the next day.
The Indonesian people we met were a fair bit conservative (by our standards) about some things. Girls wore their t-shirts and shorts while swimming, while boys could wear trunks. I was giving Terry a hug at one point and three teen girls were staring at us like we'd just removed our clothes! We stopped hugging of course. It's interesting to see how people from other parts of the world view us Westerners. We were an anomaly where we stayed, and people seemed to be quite intrigued with us. A French couple arrived one day and left within a couple of hours requesting their money back. Westerners do not stay in this place very often. That all said, people were incredibly friendly and smiled a lot. There was a language barrier, but it didn't impact the friendly gestures. One family gave Terry cookies - as he says, it was instant karma because he returned to the beach house to get my sunglasses for me:)
Life is pretty laid back in Bintan, even though people work hard - typically six days a week. And although there were language barriers, it always seemed to be fun to find ways to communicate... by the way, it's mineral water and not bottled water. We tried our best to attempt the language, and they were persistant in helping us learn it... or at the least to understand each other.
On our final day, a large group of locals invaded the beach and took over our private veranda. Our hosts gave us free coconuts, and later coffee and watermelon, to compensate. We really didn't mind, but they insisted. My daughter and I could not drink the coconut milk... I did try it but it's the first thing I honestly can't take. Terry didn't like it either, but drank and ate some of it nevertheless.
The locals are very close with their families and it was warming to see families having so much fun swimming, cooking and hanging out together. Parents do not hover over young children. At three and four years old, they swim with the older kids, splashing around as if on land without risk of drowning. Very young children ride on motorbikes either in front of the driver or in between the driver and passenger (no helmets and usually shorts and tank tops or t-shirts with no protective gear whatsoever). Our host's youngest son was four - Adey. He is a handful... one of our first introductions to him was with a huge knife in his hand as he wandered from the kitchen. All three of us tried to ease it away until Mom helped. Adey climbed up on a motorbike by himself, threw a lighter to the ground making it explode, and hauled off his drawers when he felt like being free! He got scolded for that one. He provided some entertainment, that's for sure.
We drove back to the ferry terminal in daylight. The taxi driver thought we were Australian, but that's all he said in English. The jungle was thick and at times reminded me of the forest at home with palm trees added in. Some trees were bare from leaves falling... reminding me of my favorite season at home... Fall. Mangy dogs ran along the sides of the road. Colorful houses with people sitting around them clustered in small villages. The low tides boasted about a kilometer of wet, muddy sand. And driving was cracked! Cars pass motorbikes and nearly scrape the motorbike drivers' elbows. On a two lane, narrow road, there can be three or four lines of traffic with passing or impatience. It was common to be driving facing another vehicle driving towards us. Somehow we arrived at the ferry terminal in one piece and enjoyed a relaxing hour on the ocean again.
When we arrived back in Singapore, it did feel like we'd returned home from vacation. Singapore is mostly a metropolis - pretty opposite to Bintan. And when we arrived at our apartment, we had a little visitor in our kitchen - a gecko-like creature was hanging out on the wall to welcome us home.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Rags to Riches
No, I have not become financially rich.
One evening last week, my daughter, partner, and I roamed our town centre in search of supper. Many hawker stands had people waiting for sun down in order to eat (still Ramadan) so we waited as well. We finally settled on Thosah Masala from the energetic Malay guys who make the thosah and prata (flat breads) in front of you and make a foreigner feel at ease when ordering. Turns out thosah is breakfast food and we had to go to another stall to order it special. So we did. We received our orders and drinks (you order drinks from a separate stand), and the total cost for the meal that stuffed all three of us was S$6.50.
Last Saturday after spending a delightful day on Sentosa Island strolling beaches and enjoying luge rides, we decided to go to a movie. My daughter and I had gone to a movie alone the night before and although we couldn't find the theatre we planned on visiting, we found another one. You're not allowed into the theatre until 10 minutes before the show, many people arrive late, the theatre is freezing, and seats are assigned - we ended up in the 2nd row and my neck hasn't been the same since. However, the amount of laughter and hee-haws from the audience during the movie more than made up for the strained neck. We had a ball!
On Saturday night the movie was quite a bit different. There were around 50 seats... ahem... big, cushy, comfy recliners... with a blanket on each one. And a little table with a wine holder for your bottle. And a button to press for service. The three of us got cozy in our seats and giggled until the movie began. We didn't order anything. The tickets were about 4 times the price of a standard movie. A bottle of water was S$6 - almost the same price as supper for all three of us a couple of nights earlier.
It was a grand night and we plan on doing it again. But for now we are going back to rags and have rented a cheap shack on a beach in Bintan, Indonesia for a weekend getaway. Ahhh.....
One evening last week, my daughter, partner, and I roamed our town centre in search of supper. Many hawker stands had people waiting for sun down in order to eat (still Ramadan) so we waited as well. We finally settled on Thosah Masala from the energetic Malay guys who make the thosah and prata (flat breads) in front of you and make a foreigner feel at ease when ordering. Turns out thosah is breakfast food and we had to go to another stall to order it special. So we did. We received our orders and drinks (you order drinks from a separate stand), and the total cost for the meal that stuffed all three of us was S$6.50.
Last Saturday after spending a delightful day on Sentosa Island strolling beaches and enjoying luge rides, we decided to go to a movie. My daughter and I had gone to a movie alone the night before and although we couldn't find the theatre we planned on visiting, we found another one. You're not allowed into the theatre until 10 minutes before the show, many people arrive late, the theatre is freezing, and seats are assigned - we ended up in the 2nd row and my neck hasn't been the same since. However, the amount of laughter and hee-haws from the audience during the movie more than made up for the strained neck. We had a ball!
On Saturday night the movie was quite a bit different. There were around 50 seats... ahem... big, cushy, comfy recliners... with a blanket on each one. And a little table with a wine holder for your bottle. And a button to press for service. The three of us got cozy in our seats and giggled until the movie began. We didn't order anything. The tickets were about 4 times the price of a standard movie. A bottle of water was S$6 - almost the same price as supper for all three of us a couple of nights earlier.
It was a grand night and we plan on doing it again. But for now we are going back to rags and have rented a cheap shack on a beach in Bintan, Indonesia for a weekend getaway. Ahhh.....
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles
The transit system here is excellent. Cars are outrageously expensive, so it's bus, train and taxi for us for now.
The Massive Rapid Train (MRT) is straight forward. Hop on, squish in, usually stand, hop off, possibly walk 5 minutes to transfer train, hop back on... it's relatively fast and you can take advantage of the time to read or figure out your new phone if it's not too squishy. This is the place we get the most stares.
We are definitely in a minority group around here, but there are many minority groups. Singapore is the most diverse place I've been. Expats make up around 25% of the total population. Many Singaporeans' roots are from China, Malaysia, Indonesia, and India, and it's a fairly new independent country. Add Canadians, Americans, Europeans, and Australians to the mix and you have a pretty good picture of the people that live here. It's really fantastic! Several locals have thought we were Australian.
Anyway, staring... Westerners are accustomed to more personal space than Asians. When standing on the train, holding a pole with five others in that vicinity, there is almost always one person right next to me staring into my eyes. And they aren't checking me out because I'm cute! (Especially since I cut my own bangs!!) I'm getting used to it, though, and I try to switch my thought pattern to the fact that I'm giving this person an experience of their own. Orrr... maybe they ARE checking me out because they are wondering who on earth wears these funky, badly cut bangs.
The bus is not as easy as the train. It took an hour to figure out the bus route to my daugther's school - which is only one 10-15 minute bus ride wtih no transfers! The first time I took it, I almost got on the one going in the opposite direction. Driving on the opposite side of the road makes figuring out bus routes counter-intuitive.
Buses can be extended or double decker, have steps in the rear, or just standard - same as other big cities really. One of my first days on the bus alone, I was feeling pretty proud for figuring out the overly complicated bus puzzle. It was going pretty smoothly though and I was near the end of my ride... then I couldn't find the dinger thingy for the next stop! Please let someone else ring the dinger thing. Ding! Yes! They have doorbell looking dingers, while I'm used to the string dinger. So the bus stops and I stand and step away from my seat, while getting a few stares of course... and plop! I fall about a foot south! I'd forgotten that I'd stepped up into the seat. I twisted my ankle but was otherwise fine and did the Bridget Jones walk away... smiling as if it didn't happen.
The taxi is the most efficient form of transport. Of course, it's not a straight forward phone call with the response "right away!" (If you're from Newfoundland you know what I mean.) There are a few ways to get a taxi here...
1) The Singaporean Wave Down. Stand on the side of the road. Do not flounder. Dip your hand towards the ground a couple of times while holding your arm out towards the street. Wait. Repeat. Make sure you are in an area where taxis are allowed to pull over and stop - not sure yet how to find this out. Think positive thoughts - this method could take a while. If taxis are at shift end or on call, they will not stop. It is also possible that when you do get a taxi, they turn down the fare because they don't want to go to that area or they don't know the directions, and, well, of course I don't know the directions (this actually happened only once).
2) The Taxi Stand. This can be pretty fast and easy if there is not a long queue. These taxi stands are located all over the place, especially near shopping areas (which are pretty much everywhere - Singapore is known for shopping). Sometimes there can be a 10-20 minute wait at malls or if a section of the MRT is being serviced. This is how I brought my daugther to and from school for the first week until I graduated to the bus (she now gets the school bus - yipee!).
3) Book a Taxi. When you call to book a taxi, there is an extra fee. There is also an extra fee during peak hours. When you call, you give the address and then wait. The call goes out to the all taxis in that company (there are two taxi companies here) and if/when someone wants to take the fare, they call it in and you get a 4-digit number to remember - the number of the taxi. This is relatively easy, but can be an expensive way to get around if you use it all the time.
So getting around is similar to other places with little differences in the systems. Of course, we also walk and run... yesterday I ran in the rain and it was absolutely awesome.
The Massive Rapid Train (MRT) is straight forward. Hop on, squish in, usually stand, hop off, possibly walk 5 minutes to transfer train, hop back on... it's relatively fast and you can take advantage of the time to read or figure out your new phone if it's not too squishy. This is the place we get the most stares.
We are definitely in a minority group around here, but there are many minority groups. Singapore is the most diverse place I've been. Expats make up around 25% of the total population. Many Singaporeans' roots are from China, Malaysia, Indonesia, and India, and it's a fairly new independent country. Add Canadians, Americans, Europeans, and Australians to the mix and you have a pretty good picture of the people that live here. It's really fantastic! Several locals have thought we were Australian.
Anyway, staring... Westerners are accustomed to more personal space than Asians. When standing on the train, holding a pole with five others in that vicinity, there is almost always one person right next to me staring into my eyes. And they aren't checking me out because I'm cute! (Especially since I cut my own bangs!!) I'm getting used to it, though, and I try to switch my thought pattern to the fact that I'm giving this person an experience of their own. Orrr... maybe they ARE checking me out because they are wondering who on earth wears these funky, badly cut bangs.
The bus is not as easy as the train. It took an hour to figure out the bus route to my daugther's school - which is only one 10-15 minute bus ride wtih no transfers! The first time I took it, I almost got on the one going in the opposite direction. Driving on the opposite side of the road makes figuring out bus routes counter-intuitive.
Buses can be extended or double decker, have steps in the rear, or just standard - same as other big cities really. One of my first days on the bus alone, I was feeling pretty proud for figuring out the overly complicated bus puzzle. It was going pretty smoothly though and I was near the end of my ride... then I couldn't find the dinger thingy for the next stop! Please let someone else ring the dinger thing. Ding! Yes! They have doorbell looking dingers, while I'm used to the string dinger. So the bus stops and I stand and step away from my seat, while getting a few stares of course... and plop! I fall about a foot south! I'd forgotten that I'd stepped up into the seat. I twisted my ankle but was otherwise fine and did the Bridget Jones walk away... smiling as if it didn't happen.
The taxi is the most efficient form of transport. Of course, it's not a straight forward phone call with the response "right away!" (If you're from Newfoundland you know what I mean.) There are a few ways to get a taxi here...
1) The Singaporean Wave Down. Stand on the side of the road. Do not flounder. Dip your hand towards the ground a couple of times while holding your arm out towards the street. Wait. Repeat. Make sure you are in an area where taxis are allowed to pull over and stop - not sure yet how to find this out. Think positive thoughts - this method could take a while. If taxis are at shift end or on call, they will not stop. It is also possible that when you do get a taxi, they turn down the fare because they don't want to go to that area or they don't know the directions, and, well, of course I don't know the directions (this actually happened only once).
2) The Taxi Stand. This can be pretty fast and easy if there is not a long queue. These taxi stands are located all over the place, especially near shopping areas (which are pretty much everywhere - Singapore is known for shopping). Sometimes there can be a 10-20 minute wait at malls or if a section of the MRT is being serviced. This is how I brought my daugther to and from school for the first week until I graduated to the bus (she now gets the school bus - yipee!).
3) Book a Taxi. When you call to book a taxi, there is an extra fee. There is also an extra fee during peak hours. When you call, you give the address and then wait. The call goes out to the all taxis in that company (there are two taxi companies here) and if/when someone wants to take the fare, they call it in and you get a 4-digit number to remember - the number of the taxi. This is relatively easy, but can be an expensive way to get around if you use it all the time.
So getting around is similar to other places with little differences in the systems. Of course, we also walk and run... yesterday I ran in the rain and it was absolutely awesome.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Food Frenzy
One of the first and biggest adaptations when I moved to Singapore was food. I wanted so badly to eat the local options, but my digestive system wasn't as ready as my brain.
I can't pronounce many things I've tried (and mostly enjoyed)... Kway Teow, Bee Hoon, Goteng, Tosah Masala, Tam Yum, Laksa, and so much more. Many foods are served hot with rich sauces and flavours. Eggs are a popular addition to almost all Singaporean dishes. (I even tried to get western food one evening and ordered a club house sandwich - it came with a fried egg on it.) Economic rice is an easy and fairly healthy choice - you get a pile of rice and then select however many veggie or meat/seafood choices you want from about 30. Milo (chocolate milk sort of) and Kopi are probably the most popular beverages. Once I ordered coffee in McDonald's and received Milo. My daughter drinks hot and cold Milo, and we have powdered Milo in our cupboard. It's big here.
I've learned that eating in the hawker stands is part of the reason I feel so full. It's hot outside, and the hawker stands are open to the air and not air conditioned. The people working in each stand must be so hot! We've started to take our supper away and eat from home. This seems to be working better for us.
Of course, the international options here are endless as well. Last weekend, I went to an authentic Indian restaurant. They provide wash basins so you can wash your hands before and after eating. We ordered the set meal, which includes rice and a bunch of curry dips and sauces... all served on a big banana leaf. We ate with our hands... well, actually our hand (right hand of course). After eating about 1/2 of it, I was completely stuffed. We washed our hands, paid our S$9 (for two meals), and off we went. It was delicious.. and we viewed a little cockroach scurrying across the floor as we left the restaurant.
Meals are a critical social event. Families gather around pots of soup with a variety of side dishes - similar to a fondue. The Kopi Tiams are always full. And lunch, or macay, is highly important - you do not miss it. Our property agent even asked if we'd had lunch yet and would have delayed a meeting for us to eat if we hadn't.
My daughter and I have friends that practiced Ramadan. But we've never observed it the way we see it here. Many people go out to eat here - kitchens are often not designed for a lot of cooking and eating in Kopi Tiams is cheap. A couple of times we've been at the Kopi Tiam just before sunset. The place was filled with people sitting with food and drinks on the tables in front of them. They chatted, texted, or read, but they did not eat. At exactly sunset, a voice sang out on the speakers and everyone began to eat - breaking their fast for the day. It's a pretty incredible thing to witness. It was completely natural for everyone there, but it demonstrated great restraint to us.
Last week, we bought our first full basket of groceries. Buying groceries can be such a mindless activity at home... unless you're preparing a new gourmet meal for 20 of course! Buying groceries in a new store in a new country, however, takes some thought. My daughter and I wandered up and down the narrow isles, with others scurrying around us, in search of familiar food with some new additions. Meat is going to be a challenge for us - although we managed to find some skinless boneless chicken breast. We skipped the chicken claws fully skinned and needing a nail clipping.
I also got a bottle of wine at the grocery store so we can officially celebrate settling into our new home - the cheap bottle was S$22 (about Cdn$17). My daughter got pink guava juice.
I can't pronounce many things I've tried (and mostly enjoyed)... Kway Teow, Bee Hoon, Goteng, Tosah Masala, Tam Yum, Laksa, and so much more. Many foods are served hot with rich sauces and flavours. Eggs are a popular addition to almost all Singaporean dishes. (I even tried to get western food one evening and ordered a club house sandwich - it came with a fried egg on it.) Economic rice is an easy and fairly healthy choice - you get a pile of rice and then select however many veggie or meat/seafood choices you want from about 30. Milo (chocolate milk sort of) and Kopi are probably the most popular beverages. Once I ordered coffee in McDonald's and received Milo. My daughter drinks hot and cold Milo, and we have powdered Milo in our cupboard. It's big here.
I've learned that eating in the hawker stands is part of the reason I feel so full. It's hot outside, and the hawker stands are open to the air and not air conditioned. The people working in each stand must be so hot! We've started to take our supper away and eat from home. This seems to be working better for us.
Of course, the international options here are endless as well. Last weekend, I went to an authentic Indian restaurant. They provide wash basins so you can wash your hands before and after eating. We ordered the set meal, which includes rice and a bunch of curry dips and sauces... all served on a big banana leaf. We ate with our hands... well, actually our hand (right hand of course). After eating about 1/2 of it, I was completely stuffed. We washed our hands, paid our S$9 (for two meals), and off we went. It was delicious.. and we viewed a little cockroach scurrying across the floor as we left the restaurant.
Meals are a critical social event. Families gather around pots of soup with a variety of side dishes - similar to a fondue. The Kopi Tiams are always full. And lunch, or macay, is highly important - you do not miss it. Our property agent even asked if we'd had lunch yet and would have delayed a meeting for us to eat if we hadn't.
My daughter and I have friends that practiced Ramadan. But we've never observed it the way we see it here. Many people go out to eat here - kitchens are often not designed for a lot of cooking and eating in Kopi Tiams is cheap. A couple of times we've been at the Kopi Tiam just before sunset. The place was filled with people sitting with food and drinks on the tables in front of them. They chatted, texted, or read, but they did not eat. At exactly sunset, a voice sang out on the speakers and everyone began to eat - breaking their fast for the day. It's a pretty incredible thing to witness. It was completely natural for everyone there, but it demonstrated great restraint to us.
Last week, we bought our first full basket of groceries. Buying groceries can be such a mindless activity at home... unless you're preparing a new gourmet meal for 20 of course! Buying groceries in a new store in a new country, however, takes some thought. My daughter and I wandered up and down the narrow isles, with others scurrying around us, in search of familiar food with some new additions. Meat is going to be a challenge for us - although we managed to find some skinless boneless chicken breast. We skipped the chicken claws fully skinned and needing a nail clipping.
I also got a bottle of wine at the grocery store so we can officially celebrate settling into our new home - the cheap bottle was S$22 (about Cdn$17). My daughter got pink guava juice.
Monday, September 6, 2010
Clothes
Clothes give me a continual stream of thought in Singapore. I'm not one to wear skirts or dresses. I can't find a style that looks nice on me - they look quite awful actually, and forget flattering. But skirts are an excellent item for wearing in a hot, humid climate. So, I'm challenging the neuroplasticity and I've begun to wear skirts. But not without my Body Glide... seriously the best invention ever.
Wearing a skirt is not what monopolizes my clothes thoughts, though. Naturally, you sweat a lot around here. It's hot every day... it's particularly humid. The heat isn't unbearable, though. It also rains almost every day (warm, heavy rainfalls). Since every day brings stickiness and sweat, doing laundry is CONSTANT activity.
Dryers are rarely used in Singapore. Kitchens are typically laid out so there is a clothes drying area. There is most often an opening without a window for air flow. Kitchens are not air conditioned so you keep the door closed. Many apartments have poles protruding from under the windows and clothes are hanging on them. When it's humid out, it can take up to two days for your clothes to dry!
Our kitchen doesn't have those poles outside, but we do have the opening in the wall. (We also have a bomb shelter and a maid's bathroom in our kitchen. Yes, every building that was built post 9-11 has a bomb shelter... not sure how protected we'd be since we live on the 13th floor!) I've started to create standardization processes for the laundry. I'm not sure if this obsession for efficiency is from 9 years of exposure to 'lean' at Canadian Manufacturers and Exporters or from having a bit of engineer in my blood (my brother, partner, and many colleagues will like that one:). But I have these little systems for how to take the dry clothes from the way too high rod and fold them, take the wet clothes from the washer and hang using the clothespins that are conveniently located within reach (I even tend to use the same color pins on each hanger), and then I add more clothes to the washer and have steps to follow for that too. (I'm sure part of this craziness is me missing my alphabetically organized CD collection! ha)
I'm definitely thankful I don't have a job yet while I spend this time organizing and standardizing.... then again these little obsessions might be a result of not using that part of my brain for the last few weeks.
Wearing a skirt is not what monopolizes my clothes thoughts, though. Naturally, you sweat a lot around here. It's hot every day... it's particularly humid. The heat isn't unbearable, though. It also rains almost every day (warm, heavy rainfalls). Since every day brings stickiness and sweat, doing laundry is CONSTANT activity.
Dryers are rarely used in Singapore. Kitchens are typically laid out so there is a clothes drying area. There is most often an opening without a window for air flow. Kitchens are not air conditioned so you keep the door closed. Many apartments have poles protruding from under the windows and clothes are hanging on them. When it's humid out, it can take up to two days for your clothes to dry!
Our kitchen doesn't have those poles outside, but we do have the opening in the wall. (We also have a bomb shelter and a maid's bathroom in our kitchen. Yes, every building that was built post 9-11 has a bomb shelter... not sure how protected we'd be since we live on the 13th floor!) I've started to create standardization processes for the laundry. I'm not sure if this obsession for efficiency is from 9 years of exposure to 'lean' at Canadian Manufacturers and Exporters or from having a bit of engineer in my blood (my brother, partner, and many colleagues will like that one:). But I have these little systems for how to take the dry clothes from the way too high rod and fold them, take the wet clothes from the washer and hang using the clothespins that are conveniently located within reach (I even tend to use the same color pins on each hanger), and then I add more clothes to the washer and have steps to follow for that too. (I'm sure part of this craziness is me missing my alphabetically organized CD collection! ha)
I'm definitely thankful I don't have a job yet while I spend this time organizing and standardizing.... then again these little obsessions might be a result of not using that part of my brain for the last few weeks.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Eat, Love, Pray? No problem.
My friend sent me info on a retreat to Bali that was inspired by the book/movie "Eat, Love, Pray". I'm sure every almost woman over 35ish can relate to it - although I haven't read/seen it yet. The timing of the retreat doesn't work for me, but I'm eating, loving and praying anyway.
Eating
Singaporeans LOVE their food. My digestive system, on the other hand, does not love Singaporean food. We've eaten all kinds of noodles, sauces, veggies, soups, new combinations, and some meats - oh, and eggs are served with everything - raw or cooked. One morning last weekend, I had Indian food for breakfast, and although it was absolutely delicious, it must have contained my entire allowable calories for the day!
You can get all kinds of seafood here - mostly prepared in rich sauces and/or soups, although dried fish is common too. Chili sauce, chilies, and 'spicy' are common. Even McDonald's gives out chili packets. One of the hawker stands in our Town Centre serves frog. I'll wait to try that.
A few days ago, I decided to eat lighter. Why do we take so many photos at times wen we eat so much? I am gaining weight! I started eating granola for breakfast... ohhhmmmm... the smallest things from our 'normal home life' make us feel calmer.
Loving
If you know me, you know I live in the 'love world'. I am loving the moments I'm so lucky to be having and I'm practicing gratitude daily. In addition to that, though, my partner and I have started date night! Yes! Like the movie, but a wee bit less adventurous - so far anyway:) Last Sunday we went to East Coast Park. It was wonderful.
The long stretch of beach and grassy land was peppered with scrumptious smelling restaurants and people spending time with their loved ones. Bike and in-line skate rental shops are open until 10pm, and we went for a 2-hour skate.... it felt good to get physical (and get blisters!). The path is smooth and lit after sun down. Young adults pitch tents along the way and have weekend camp-outs. Meditation groups sit and ring their bell every so often. Hundreds of boats are lined up in the ocean... and of course, green is everywhere. It's a fabulous place to go... to be... to laugh.... to love...
After our skate, with our feet swollen, red, and blistered and our clothes soaked, the guy at the rental shop yelled to another to confirm our rental... he said 'ang mo'... this was the first time I heard us being called 'white man'. Apparently it's common.
Naturally, we had to end our date with food... and we had Turkish food! I had chicken shish - yum!
On our way home we were privy to an annual, local tradition called the Hungry Ghost Ghetan (not sure of the spelling). The Chinese have an old tradition that in the 7th month (lunar), they make offerings to the ghosts (dead), and towards the end of the month, they celebrate with a dinner, auction, and show. Since we've arrived, we've seen many of these offerings around the city - they usually comprise oranges, apples, cakes, flowers, burning incense, and burning paper money. They can be set up lavishly on tables or simply on the edge of sidewalks. The air often smells like burning paper. My question is, "what happens to the offerings when the ghosts don't take them?" Anyway, we were super lucky to have witnessed such an event and we walked home smiling.
We are definitely loving.
Praying
Many religions are practiced here. In our first week here we spent a day exploring China Town and visited three temples - a Mosque, an Indian temple, and a Buddhist temple.
To enter the Mosque, we removed our shoes and wore robes (we had shorts and tank tops on). The practioners were chanting and bowing as we walked around careful not to step on the carpet, as instructed. I read about the history of the Islamic religion and appreciated the differences, although I couldn't agree with all the beliefs. We left feeling calm.
The Indian temple was an entirely different experience. Statues of the many gods and goddesses were lavishly displayed. Alters were arranged. The temple itself was amazingly colorful and intricately designed. We removed our shoes and walked on concrete this time... some of which was exposed to the sun and was too hot to stand on. Each god/goddess had an area in front of it to worship and many had donation boxes. A foot washing station was provided. And some people who followed the faith meditated or prayed or just sat - being. It was a peaceful yet colorful place that felt full of life.
My favorite was the Buddhist temple. Thousands of Buddha statues were placed around the four floor temple. At the entrances you could light incense and pray or meditate. All three of us lit incense and placed it in the burning area, and I sent healing thoughts to the people in my life struggling with illness. I think of them often.
Towards the back of the first floor was a gigantic gold Buddha statue and six or seven monks chanting with meditation symbols. The chanting was incredibly calming. Each floor boasted another fantastical attraction. We witnessed people meditating on pillows, being blessed by a monk, and praying around a prayer wheel (one of the largest in the world). We read the story of Buddha and my daughter and I took a moment to sit together on a bench in the rooftop garden, which was full of lush greenery and flowers and trickling water. It was a peaceful, enriching experience... and I'd like to have that rooftop on my building.
Although we all have differing beliefs and each at varying levels, one commonality is the desire to be connected. That day I felt connected. The last month or so has been hectic and busy with every day full of tasks and appointments and deadlines and to do lists. I'm trying to remember to take a moment each day to get connected to my inner self. It goes a long way when dealing with the challenges presented by an international move.
I think I will begin to investigate the retreats offered in this area of the world. Maybe instead of becoming a CEO I'll become a master yogi:) (Both in my dreams!)
Eating
Singaporeans LOVE their food. My digestive system, on the other hand, does not love Singaporean food. We've eaten all kinds of noodles, sauces, veggies, soups, new combinations, and some meats - oh, and eggs are served with everything - raw or cooked. One morning last weekend, I had Indian food for breakfast, and although it was absolutely delicious, it must have contained my entire allowable calories for the day!
You can get all kinds of seafood here - mostly prepared in rich sauces and/or soups, although dried fish is common too. Chili sauce, chilies, and 'spicy' are common. Even McDonald's gives out chili packets. One of the hawker stands in our Town Centre serves frog. I'll wait to try that.
A few days ago, I decided to eat lighter. Why do we take so many photos at times wen we eat so much? I am gaining weight! I started eating granola for breakfast... ohhhmmmm... the smallest things from our 'normal home life' make us feel calmer.
Loving
If you know me, you know I live in the 'love world'. I am loving the moments I'm so lucky to be having and I'm practicing gratitude daily. In addition to that, though, my partner and I have started date night! Yes! Like the movie, but a wee bit less adventurous - so far anyway:) Last Sunday we went to East Coast Park. It was wonderful.
The long stretch of beach and grassy land was peppered with scrumptious smelling restaurants and people spending time with their loved ones. Bike and in-line skate rental shops are open until 10pm, and we went for a 2-hour skate.... it felt good to get physical (and get blisters!). The path is smooth and lit after sun down. Young adults pitch tents along the way and have weekend camp-outs. Meditation groups sit and ring their bell every so often. Hundreds of boats are lined up in the ocean... and of course, green is everywhere. It's a fabulous place to go... to be... to laugh.... to love...
After our skate, with our feet swollen, red, and blistered and our clothes soaked, the guy at the rental shop yelled to another to confirm our rental... he said 'ang mo'... this was the first time I heard us being called 'white man'. Apparently it's common.
Naturally, we had to end our date with food... and we had Turkish food! I had chicken shish - yum!
On our way home we were privy to an annual, local tradition called the Hungry Ghost Ghetan (not sure of the spelling). The Chinese have an old tradition that in the 7th month (lunar), they make offerings to the ghosts (dead), and towards the end of the month, they celebrate with a dinner, auction, and show. Since we've arrived, we've seen many of these offerings around the city - they usually comprise oranges, apples, cakes, flowers, burning incense, and burning paper money. They can be set up lavishly on tables or simply on the edge of sidewalks. The air often smells like burning paper. My question is, "what happens to the offerings when the ghosts don't take them?" Anyway, we were super lucky to have witnessed such an event and we walked home smiling.
We are definitely loving.
Praying
Many religions are practiced here. In our first week here we spent a day exploring China Town and visited three temples - a Mosque, an Indian temple, and a Buddhist temple.
To enter the Mosque, we removed our shoes and wore robes (we had shorts and tank tops on). The practioners were chanting and bowing as we walked around careful not to step on the carpet, as instructed. I read about the history of the Islamic religion and appreciated the differences, although I couldn't agree with all the beliefs. We left feeling calm.
The Indian temple was an entirely different experience. Statues of the many gods and goddesses were lavishly displayed. Alters were arranged. The temple itself was amazingly colorful and intricately designed. We removed our shoes and walked on concrete this time... some of which was exposed to the sun and was too hot to stand on. Each god/goddess had an area in front of it to worship and many had donation boxes. A foot washing station was provided. And some people who followed the faith meditated or prayed or just sat - being. It was a peaceful yet colorful place that felt full of life.
My favorite was the Buddhist temple. Thousands of Buddha statues were placed around the four floor temple. At the entrances you could light incense and pray or meditate. All three of us lit incense and placed it in the burning area, and I sent healing thoughts to the people in my life struggling with illness. I think of them often.
Towards the back of the first floor was a gigantic gold Buddha statue and six or seven monks chanting with meditation symbols. The chanting was incredibly calming. Each floor boasted another fantastical attraction. We witnessed people meditating on pillows, being blessed by a monk, and praying around a prayer wheel (one of the largest in the world). We read the story of Buddha and my daughter and I took a moment to sit together on a bench in the rooftop garden, which was full of lush greenery and flowers and trickling water. It was a peaceful, enriching experience... and I'd like to have that rooftop on my building.
Although we all have differing beliefs and each at varying levels, one commonality is the desire to be connected. That day I felt connected. The last month or so has been hectic and busy with every day full of tasks and appointments and deadlines and to do lists. I'm trying to remember to take a moment each day to get connected to my inner self. It goes a long way when dealing with the challenges presented by an international move.
I think I will begin to investigate the retreats offered in this area of the world. Maybe instead of becoming a CEO I'll become a master yogi:) (Both in my dreams!)
Ouch! That Feels Good
That Indonesian massage I had a couple of weeks ago was one of those 'the more it hurts, the better it feels' experiences.
On my daughter's first day of school, my partner and I spent a frustrating hour trying to pay her tuition. The credit card was flagged so we had to call VISA. We'd already alerted VISA we'd be using the card internationally for a large purchase, so this was our 2nd call to them. We waited on hold for about 20 minutes. Finally we got a person! After many calls to other VISA centres and banks, the poor campus administrator and my partner got it figured out. The younger and likely less experienced girl that served us first had used the wrong machine! One hour later.. Brittany's school fees - too much.... a missed appointment at the Employment Pass Centre for fingerprinting - approximately $100 in time... the international VISA experience - priceless (well, VISA is like Mastercard, right? :).
After our priceless adventure, we decided to wander.... and we found an Indonesian massage centre! Yay! My neck and back were incredibly sore and my man was craving a foot massage (that's correct, I have not been giving him foot massages!). Unlike at home, where a massage appointment needs to be booked weeks in advance, we had appointments immediately! My partner was led to the reflexology area and I was led up several narrow stairways - all carpeted in deep red with rich tapestries hanging on the walls and statues adorning the dark, solid wood shelves. Soft, meditative instrumental music with the occasional chant played. Upstairs there were massage 'stalls' - each curtained off with a massage table inside. The Indonesian lady left me to prepare, which I did and lay on the table thinking, "I'm in heaven!"
The beginning of the massage was fairly light... getting warmed up. Brutality followed! Gentle mary mother of god (is this a NL expression?).... the massage lady's fiingers and knuckles and heels of her hands, and I swear, her elbows, dug in and found every sore sinew of muscle. She prodded and kneeded every centimeter of my back, getting on top of the table for more force at times. It killed! But it felt so good. I jumped and jittered the whole way through. When she started on my neck I thought I should tell her about my chronic neck problems... but I figured a good, strong massage might help make it better. So I winced through the painful, yet weirdly satisfying, neck rub.
Ahhhh.... over. Feeling good.... like when those bells ring loud forever and ever and when they stop silence is a huge relief and feels so good.
The Indonesian lady left me alone to find my way back... a little dazed, I made only one wrong turn, and I managed to return to the front desk, where they had the most amazing cup of hot ginger tea waiting for me. I lapped it up as I sat in a state of subdued consciousness as I waited for my partner. Ahhhhh.....
Next day... pain! I bought a neck pillow that was too hard and, after 5 sleepless nights, I splurged on a S$97 contoured pillow and managed to get some peaceful sleep.
Sarah (my massage therapist at home), I want you here in Singapore!!
On my daughter's first day of school, my partner and I spent a frustrating hour trying to pay her tuition. The credit card was flagged so we had to call VISA. We'd already alerted VISA we'd be using the card internationally for a large purchase, so this was our 2nd call to them. We waited on hold for about 20 minutes. Finally we got a person! After many calls to other VISA centres and banks, the poor campus administrator and my partner got it figured out. The younger and likely less experienced girl that served us first had used the wrong machine! One hour later.. Brittany's school fees - too much.... a missed appointment at the Employment Pass Centre for fingerprinting - approximately $100 in time... the international VISA experience - priceless (well, VISA is like Mastercard, right? :).
After our priceless adventure, we decided to wander.... and we found an Indonesian massage centre! Yay! My neck and back were incredibly sore and my man was craving a foot massage (that's correct, I have not been giving him foot massages!). Unlike at home, where a massage appointment needs to be booked weeks in advance, we had appointments immediately! My partner was led to the reflexology area and I was led up several narrow stairways - all carpeted in deep red with rich tapestries hanging on the walls and statues adorning the dark, solid wood shelves. Soft, meditative instrumental music with the occasional chant played. Upstairs there were massage 'stalls' - each curtained off with a massage table inside. The Indonesian lady left me to prepare, which I did and lay on the table thinking, "I'm in heaven!"
The beginning of the massage was fairly light... getting warmed up. Brutality followed! Gentle mary mother of god (is this a NL expression?).... the massage lady's fiingers and knuckles and heels of her hands, and I swear, her elbows, dug in and found every sore sinew of muscle. She prodded and kneeded every centimeter of my back, getting on top of the table for more force at times. It killed! But it felt so good. I jumped and jittered the whole way through. When she started on my neck I thought I should tell her about my chronic neck problems... but I figured a good, strong massage might help make it better. So I winced through the painful, yet weirdly satisfying, neck rub.
Ahhhh.... over. Feeling good.... like when those bells ring loud forever and ever and when they stop silence is a huge relief and feels so good.
The Indonesian lady left me alone to find my way back... a little dazed, I made only one wrong turn, and I managed to return to the front desk, where they had the most amazing cup of hot ginger tea waiting for me. I lapped it up as I sat in a state of subdued consciousness as I waited for my partner. Ahhhhh.....
Next day... pain! I bought a neck pillow that was too hard and, after 5 sleepless nights, I splurged on a S$97 contoured pillow and managed to get some peaceful sleep.
Sarah (my massage therapist at home), I want you here in Singapore!!
Peek-a-boo
People go out at night to exercise in Singapore. The city comes alive in a different way. Lights are everywhere... lighting walkways and fitness areas, hanging from trees, and shining over bridges.
Every time we walk to the local Town Centre in the dark (it gets dark around 7 p.m.), we hear the pongs from the tennis courts (located on our condo facility) and splashes from swimmers in the pool, we see the fitness buffs workout in the air conditioned gym (also on our condo facility), and we admire the runners jogging along the streets and walkways and rivers... some finishing with a dip in the pool or a round in the outdoor bootcamp area (yes, on our condo facility). Perfect.
Of course, not unlike other parts of the world, people are watching TV in their living rooms. Being on the 13th floor, I can see into windows. Noooo.... I'm not a peeping Tina! But if you look out your window, you can see into others. Most have 1 or 2 people watching TV or eating dinner. There's a family of 6 or 7 piled onto a huge couch together. There's a couple eating dinner on the floor. And there's a guy standing in his window talking on the phone... eeek! I think he saw me!
I wonder will people watch us as we watch TV, eat our meals, or practice yoga? Yesterday, a whole bunch of furniture arrived, so it's possible now. And so far, we swim a few times a week, I've gone for a run in the dark, yet humid, evening (and went for a dip afterwards - awesome!), and I bought tennis rackets and a yoga mat.
Yep, we're settling in. And maybe I'll sign up for a 1/2 marathon afterall...
Every time we walk to the local Town Centre in the dark (it gets dark around 7 p.m.), we hear the pongs from the tennis courts (located on our condo facility) and splashes from swimmers in the pool, we see the fitness buffs workout in the air conditioned gym (also on our condo facility), and we admire the runners jogging along the streets and walkways and rivers... some finishing with a dip in the pool or a round in the outdoor bootcamp area (yes, on our condo facility). Perfect.
Of course, not unlike other parts of the world, people are watching TV in their living rooms. Being on the 13th floor, I can see into windows. Noooo.... I'm not a peeping Tina! But if you look out your window, you can see into others. Most have 1 or 2 people watching TV or eating dinner. There's a family of 6 or 7 piled onto a huge couch together. There's a couple eating dinner on the floor. And there's a guy standing in his window talking on the phone... eeek! I think he saw me!
I wonder will people watch us as we watch TV, eat our meals, or practice yoga? Yesterday, a whole bunch of furniture arrived, so it's possible now. And so far, we swim a few times a week, I've gone for a run in the dark, yet humid, evening (and went for a dip afterwards - awesome!), and I bought tennis rackets and a yoga mat.
Yep, we're settling in. And maybe I'll sign up for a 1/2 marathon afterall...
Thursday, September 2, 2010
The Wonders of the World
Last week, I sat by our beautiful pool in Singapore watching my daughter gracefully glide through the water. I always saw her amazing strength and grace on stage when she danced, and she has all that in the pool too.
One of the reasons we moved to Singapore when we did was to give my teen this worldly experience, to enrich her life and help her grow. The experience of a teen, however, is hugely different than that of a parent/adult. The most important thing for my daughter is fitting in and making friends. Experiencing the culture, seeing everything this part of the world has to offer, trying new foods, traveling to new places... all important but secondary to the significance of social assimilation with other teens her age.
As a parent, I'm trying to make this experience as rich as possible while also understanding a teen's needs. It's easier for me since I'm here with my partner (although I definitely need my own friends!). So what is it that she needs from me anyway? Every day is new, every situation presents something to learn, every action that was mindless in the past is now filled with brain activity. As much as 'acting like Westerners' when in a foreign land makes some cringe (and me too at times), I think this is what I can give to my daughter to help her feel at ease and gradually increase her level of comfort.
Most of our days to date have been completely different, but they are beginning to be somewhat like before... get up, go to school, make sure she has money for lunch, sign up for extra curricular activities, meet the teachers, do homework, and now that we have groceries... cook supper (well, we don't have pots and pans yet:). The fact that there are uniforms, new friends, different class schedules, different food in the cafeteria, and different transportation systems provides the enriching part. The other day she came home from school telling me all about the geography she learned from her friends and she knew a few Korean words. Yesterday, she tried to get away with wearing jeans instead of her uniform to school. So it's the same but different.
My wonderful teenager continuously teaches me... whether it's how to listen better or remind me to take in the present moment. She does this by physically making me do this with her (one night she practically forced me to swim)... but she also does this at times when she's not taking advantage of what is in front of her and I cringe at what she's missing.
We all learn in our own ways on our own time schedules... and who am I to say what she's learning?
My teen has been thrown into the water and needs to learn how to swim on her own. I'm holding her up now, but she needs to swim with strength and grace when I'm not there. I am watching with wonder as she grows and I wonder if I'm the one afraid to let her swim on her own.
One of the reasons we moved to Singapore when we did was to give my teen this worldly experience, to enrich her life and help her grow. The experience of a teen, however, is hugely different than that of a parent/adult. The most important thing for my daughter is fitting in and making friends. Experiencing the culture, seeing everything this part of the world has to offer, trying new foods, traveling to new places... all important but secondary to the significance of social assimilation with other teens her age.
As a parent, I'm trying to make this experience as rich as possible while also understanding a teen's needs. It's easier for me since I'm here with my partner (although I definitely need my own friends!). So what is it that she needs from me anyway? Every day is new, every situation presents something to learn, every action that was mindless in the past is now filled with brain activity. As much as 'acting like Westerners' when in a foreign land makes some cringe (and me too at times), I think this is what I can give to my daughter to help her feel at ease and gradually increase her level of comfort.
Most of our days to date have been completely different, but they are beginning to be somewhat like before... get up, go to school, make sure she has money for lunch, sign up for extra curricular activities, meet the teachers, do homework, and now that we have groceries... cook supper (well, we don't have pots and pans yet:). The fact that there are uniforms, new friends, different class schedules, different food in the cafeteria, and different transportation systems provides the enriching part. The other day she came home from school telling me all about the geography she learned from her friends and she knew a few Korean words. Yesterday, she tried to get away with wearing jeans instead of her uniform to school. So it's the same but different.
My wonderful teenager continuously teaches me... whether it's how to listen better or remind me to take in the present moment. She does this by physically making me do this with her (one night she practically forced me to swim)... but she also does this at times when she's not taking advantage of what is in front of her and I cringe at what she's missing.
We all learn in our own ways on our own time schedules... and who am I to say what she's learning?
My teen has been thrown into the water and needs to learn how to swim on her own. I'm holding her up now, but she needs to swim with strength and grace when I'm not there. I am watching with wonder as she grows and I wonder if I'm the one afraid to let her swim on her own.
Habit Haulover
In order to manage the stresses of all the changes occuring, I've started to simply accept that I need to change some of my habits.
It's incredibly difficult to get a 'coffee to go (a.k.a. take away) with a tiny bit of milk'. It's impossible to find light blend coffee... even at Starbucks. I've been drinking Kopi, but it's full of calories. You can also get Kopi-O (without condensed milk) or Kopi-C (with Carnation milk), neither of which appeal to me. I like my coffee with just a tiny bit of milk... fresh milk... and no sugar.
With all the heavy sauces and Kopi drinking, I'm gaining weight! And I'm walking everywhere and swimming in our pool a few times a week. So, as much as I like the idea of drinking Kopi for less than $1 while reading the Singapore paper at the Kopi Tiam (coffee shop), I have found a compromise to my coffee addiction... ahem... habit.
McDonald's is everywhere here! Each morning I purchase a coffee and a small milk (they don't have milk for coffee - only cream or CoffeeMate). To date, my partner drank the milk after I dribbled a few drops into my coffee. This may not be my long-term solution, but it works right now while I'm in transition.
I had a cup of fabulous ginger tea after an Indonesian massage during our first week here. I tried ordering ginger tea at the hawker stand the next day and got ginger tea... with sugar and some sort of cream. A couple of days ago I ordered Tea-O Ping... iced tea without condensed milk. It was swwweet! Sweet as in sugary sweet... but I drank it anyway.
I'm open to a full habit haulover... by taking baby steps.
It's incredibly difficult to get a 'coffee to go (a.k.a. take away) with a tiny bit of milk'. It's impossible to find light blend coffee... even at Starbucks. I've been drinking Kopi, but it's full of calories. You can also get Kopi-O (without condensed milk) or Kopi-C (with Carnation milk), neither of which appeal to me. I like my coffee with just a tiny bit of milk... fresh milk... and no sugar.
With all the heavy sauces and Kopi drinking, I'm gaining weight! And I'm walking everywhere and swimming in our pool a few times a week. So, as much as I like the idea of drinking Kopi for less than $1 while reading the Singapore paper at the Kopi Tiam (coffee shop), I have found a compromise to my coffee addiction... ahem... habit.
McDonald's is everywhere here! Each morning I purchase a coffee and a small milk (they don't have milk for coffee - only cream or CoffeeMate). To date, my partner drank the milk after I dribbled a few drops into my coffee. This may not be my long-term solution, but it works right now while I'm in transition.
I had a cup of fabulous ginger tea after an Indonesian massage during our first week here. I tried ordering ginger tea at the hawker stand the next day and got ginger tea... with sugar and some sort of cream. A couple of days ago I ordered Tea-O Ping... iced tea without condensed milk. It was swwweet! Sweet as in sugary sweet... but I drank it anyway.
I'm open to a full habit haulover... by taking baby steps.
Neuron Shake
If you want to shake up your neurons and challenge neuroplasticity, sell your house, quit your job, close your business, give away all your belongings, pack a few suitcases, and move to a new country with your teen and partner.
On August 16th, 2010, we moved from Newfoundland Labrador, Canada to Singapore - 10.5 hours in the future, a different culture, different driving rules, and different diet. Surely adding a different language with limited people speaking yours will be like a steroid neuron shake.
I wonder if the experience on the synapses is the same at 40 with a teen in tow as at 25 just out of university with no kids? Obviously, the experiences will be different - less money, less wisdom, no worries about your child's welfare and comfort. But the shock to the brain might be similar.
So the three of us arrived in Singapore two days after departing. The over 30 hour journey was fairly uneventful with us sleeping most of the flight between Toronto and Hong Kong. My partner (who had already lived in Singapore for 3 years) fretted a little when they asked for our passes in Toronto and none of us had them. But our documentation was enough. When we arrived in Singapore, they easily stamped our passports, and we had officially landed. We were fairly disconnected from our other worlds with limited Internet and a 10.5 hour time difference. Mostly though, we were jet lagged and incredibly busy taking care of getting settled.
Within two days, my 16 year old daughter had a medical at the local clinic for her student pass, we ate at the local 'hawker stands', we had my daughter's school orientation, we viewed 10 apartments, and my partner had to visit work and get a few things sorted. By day 5, my daughter started school and we'd been introduced to Singapore culture like an infant being born to the earthly world.
All three of us spent the first six days in a small hotel room while we somewhat ferociously battled jetlag. We woke at 2:30 a.m. the first day and my daughter and I were at the hotel lobby front desk asking for our Internet password at 3:00 a.m., bright eyed and bushy tailed!
We focused on finding our new home immediately. Property agents are used for renting as well as buying here. Our property agent drove us around to 10 apartments in 2 days. Some were awful... dark and dingy and smelly. My daughter's only criteria was that the bathroom was decent. My only criteria was that my daughter was comfortable. We found a great condo and moved in on day six after our arrival.
Living in a fairly empty apartment for a week - we had 2 mattresses and accumulated most of our kitchen and bathroom necessities - we happily wandered from shopping mall to shopping area to shopping street to shopping centre in search of the right furniture (nice but cheap). We spent a small fortune on taxis, but amongst all the neuron vibrations, we managed to travel via train (MRT) and bus as well. We also managed to order most of our furniture... our couch arrived a few days ago!
Although English is the national language of Singapore, it does not mean everyone speaks it clearly and understands it fully. We've been occasionally challenged with explaining directions, but ordering food has been fairly straight forward. Extra conversation is often a challenge... and I've received the wrong order in food at times:)
Crossing the street is still not a natural acivity for me. I continue to not have a clue which way to look for oncoming traffic. I'm getting used to not tipping - most people wil not accept a tip here - and not clearing my own table in restaurants and hawker stands - it's someone's job to do so.
Parts of this city are very similar to other big cities - lots of people hustling and bustling, shopping, hopping into cabs or onto busses and trains. But there is a gentler side to Singapore. Older folks drink Kopi (strong coffee with condensed milk and lots of sugar) and talk and laugh in the hawker stands, grandmas and grandpas care for their grandchildren, service people smile and greet you, taxi drivers help with directions and culture differences (and sometimes provide entertainment!), strangers explain which bus to take...
Amidst all the neuron shaking, there is a sense of calm. With all the differences, it's somewhat like home. Human beings are human beings. I remember my junior high school friend from Portugal writing a poem called "People are the Same" when we were in grade 9. I don't think I understood it back then, but of course I did later in life. Now I relate to it.
Namaste...
On August 16th, 2010, we moved from Newfoundland Labrador, Canada to Singapore - 10.5 hours in the future, a different culture, different driving rules, and different diet. Surely adding a different language with limited people speaking yours will be like a steroid neuron shake.
I wonder if the experience on the synapses is the same at 40 with a teen in tow as at 25 just out of university with no kids? Obviously, the experiences will be different - less money, less wisdom, no worries about your child's welfare and comfort. But the shock to the brain might be similar.
So the three of us arrived in Singapore two days after departing. The over 30 hour journey was fairly uneventful with us sleeping most of the flight between Toronto and Hong Kong. My partner (who had already lived in Singapore for 3 years) fretted a little when they asked for our passes in Toronto and none of us had them. But our documentation was enough. When we arrived in Singapore, they easily stamped our passports, and we had officially landed. We were fairly disconnected from our other worlds with limited Internet and a 10.5 hour time difference. Mostly though, we were jet lagged and incredibly busy taking care of getting settled.
Within two days, my 16 year old daughter had a medical at the local clinic for her student pass, we ate at the local 'hawker stands', we had my daughter's school orientation, we viewed 10 apartments, and my partner had to visit work and get a few things sorted. By day 5, my daughter started school and we'd been introduced to Singapore culture like an infant being born to the earthly world.
All three of us spent the first six days in a small hotel room while we somewhat ferociously battled jetlag. We woke at 2:30 a.m. the first day and my daughter and I were at the hotel lobby front desk asking for our Internet password at 3:00 a.m., bright eyed and bushy tailed!
We focused on finding our new home immediately. Property agents are used for renting as well as buying here. Our property agent drove us around to 10 apartments in 2 days. Some were awful... dark and dingy and smelly. My daughter's only criteria was that the bathroom was decent. My only criteria was that my daughter was comfortable. We found a great condo and moved in on day six after our arrival.
Living in a fairly empty apartment for a week - we had 2 mattresses and accumulated most of our kitchen and bathroom necessities - we happily wandered from shopping mall to shopping area to shopping street to shopping centre in search of the right furniture (nice but cheap). We spent a small fortune on taxis, but amongst all the neuron vibrations, we managed to travel via train (MRT) and bus as well. We also managed to order most of our furniture... our couch arrived a few days ago!
Although English is the national language of Singapore, it does not mean everyone speaks it clearly and understands it fully. We've been occasionally challenged with explaining directions, but ordering food has been fairly straight forward. Extra conversation is often a challenge... and I've received the wrong order in food at times:)
Crossing the street is still not a natural acivity for me. I continue to not have a clue which way to look for oncoming traffic. I'm getting used to not tipping - most people wil not accept a tip here - and not clearing my own table in restaurants and hawker stands - it's someone's job to do so.
Parts of this city are very similar to other big cities - lots of people hustling and bustling, shopping, hopping into cabs or onto busses and trains. But there is a gentler side to Singapore. Older folks drink Kopi (strong coffee with condensed milk and lots of sugar) and talk and laugh in the hawker stands, grandmas and grandpas care for their grandchildren, service people smile and greet you, taxi drivers help with directions and culture differences (and sometimes provide entertainment!), strangers explain which bus to take...
Amidst all the neuron shaking, there is a sense of calm. With all the differences, it's somewhat like home. Human beings are human beings. I remember my junior high school friend from Portugal writing a poem called "People are the Same" when we were in grade 9. I don't think I understood it back then, but of course I did later in life. Now I relate to it.
Namaste...
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